RonJeremyJohnson
ronjeremyjohnson
9/3/19
7:23 PM
31

Nothing says “we take this very seriously” like a screenshot from the Notes app.

10/16/18
9:16 PM
5

Really showing some versatility here. Before tonight he hit one woman, and then followed it up by hitting two men. A little sexist, but whatever.

10/3/18
12:53 AM
215

Why even write about this? Are we going to ruin Javy Baez’s life over what he did 35 minutes ago? Plus, three of his best buddies on the Cubs said they didn’t remember any interference.

9/2/18
9:53 PM
1

The town immediately gained sentience and started IMing all of the girls on its buddy list, “A/S/L?”

7/21/18
3:49 PM
21

Do you want a police report BEFORE the fact? If you’re assaulted, is the statute of limitations 24 hours for you to be believed?

7/6/18
1:14 AM
3

That little shitass didn’t stay up to watch the end of the game? No wonder he’s not a Cardinals fan.

3/29/18
6:26 PM
Save

Lol...this response should be a space in “Dave McKenna Deadspin Expose Comment” bingo.

1/28/18
1:38 AM
54

For all I know, the kid he dunked over could’ve been Bigfoot or one of the guys from the grassy knoll.

9/6/17
4:26 PM
20

I read this as “on course to die in December” and didn’t even question it.