A single dog dies in an overhead bin and a senator immediately submits a bill to make sure it won’t happen again, and yet we still don’t have gun control.

Toto, I’m afraid we’re not in Kansas anymore...

Good headphones and/or booze make all but the absolute worst flights tolerable. Eye masks can also help (I always pack a bandanna to in case my neighbors are extra annoying).

I’m about 6'3", and if the person in front of me reclines my knees are wedged against the seat and I barely have room to hold an iPad. If I have a window seat, I have to bend my neck to keep my head from hitting the door. If I have an aisle seat, my shoulders hang over the edge of the seat and people are running into…

*turns phone*

15 year olds everywhere just stretched their necks trying to see this.

I feel like I caught a venereal disease after visiting that website.

It was the most emotionally grueling work imaginable. 14-16 hour days, 7 days a week dealing with thousands of traumatized, desperate people trying to care for their families and bury their dead while facing homelessness. I spent a fuckton of my FEMA pay on therapy after Katrina. 12 years out and I still get severe…

Not just evil rich people, being Republican is enough. They do this to emergency responders all the time at local levels, too. You get shit like the Post and other tabloids publishing “horrifying” accounts of firefighters and EMTs and cops being paid “outrageous” salaries when overtime is included — and never mention…

I remember working for the Census on the side back when I was in school. I was a test administrator in an area where they were struggling to get enough qualified takers, so they begged me to run weekend exams. I lived ~50 miles from the testing sites and the entire office knew this, but they wanted it done. As the…

Back in the UK I used to work with someone who had a Citroën with the hydrolastic suspension. One day he parks up for a delivery, and old gravel-knees slides over telling him “you can’t park there! I’ll have to clamp it!”

Just drive off with it.

You’ll shoot yer eye out, kid!

Seriously, not one WKRP reference in the entire article? I want my money back!

Wait a second there....

One of the funniest sequences ever to air on television.

It’s typically ill advised to throw the pilot out of the aircraft you are currently occupying...

Despite growing up near Yellville, I never attended Turkey Trot because we always shot our own turkey each November. It’s pretty easy really. They just sit there and don’t move much. You just have to wait until you have a clear shot. They’re always grouped together and I never missed.

First thing I thought of.

As god as his witness, he thought turkeys could fly.