No, because the Comey letter caused a few thousand people to either vote for Trump instead of her or to not vote at all, and that was enough to give Trump Florida, North Carolina, Michigan, Pennsylvania and Wisconsin.

Hire a sex worker to watch this shitty movie with you.

The first guy to be executed after California brought the death penalty back had killed two teenagers and then ate their Burger King or whatever. Every article you'd see about it would emphasize that point, like it was somehow so much worse than just killing them. I mean, clearly, it's a sign of a fucked-up…

Beetle Bailey started in the 50's.

No, they aren't all war movies, but they're all movies that wouldn't exist without the war. War movies as a genre aren't usually all that great.

Forget it Wafflicious; it's Racsimtown.

"Chicken Soup" would never have been canceled.

Slander! He died of his injuries and was in no way coerced into suicide! The Nazis were way too principled for that!

Casablanca, Schindler's List, Saving Private Ryan, Letters From Iwo Jima, The Thin Red Line, Hope and Glory, Guns of Navarone, and many others all come to mind pretty quickly. (Yeah, I know a few of those have nothing to do with Nazis, but it's all connected, right?)

Who says he wasn't?

Let's try and keep a lid on the puns, OK?

I don't smoke pot, but that's about where I am with masturbation.

Are you worried about getting sacked?

Shit, I didn't even mention voter suppression. Sad to say, I kind of forgot about it, when of course that's a major reason for lower black turnout.

In New Zealand I met a blond-haired, blue-eyed, white Samoan. At first I thought she was fucking with me, but her and her obviously Polynesian friend were definitely speaking in another language, and it didn't sound made up, so I'm pretty sure she was legit.

I was talking to my half-Filipino roommate and his brothers one time and I mentioned that I'd never seen a Filipino restaurant anywhere. His older brother just said, "There's a reason for that," and then proceeded to describe the most disgusting dishes I could ever imagine.

I didn't say they will.

As awful as Trump is, I think over the next few years there will be a handful of times that he pleasantly surprises us with the inconsistency of his views. A few of those might be times that he figures out there's some financial angle on an issue that other Republicans aren't seeing.

I'm talking about those who have made it clear that they otherwise would be voting Democratic. If you're a committed Green party member or someone who usually doesn't vote, but feel motivated by Stein or anything like that, I certainly don't begrudge that vote. But if you're generally a Democratic voter in a swing…

Yeah, we went for Bush in '88. Twelve year old me was heartbroken.