I keep reading this and laughing, then taking another read and bursting into laughter all over again. I can't NOT hear it in tune, and it's just awful and amazing.

When the parents stand in the way of getting the child the psychological help she wants, then yes, you can blame it on the parents.

At an old job, I had a phone number that was one digit off from the local television station's call-in line. Early in my tenure there, I had a woman screaming at me about road closings due to weather one day, and hoped that was the worst of it.

My mom doesn't know what she likes to order anywhere. My father or I will always order for her because she has no idea what she actually likes or no memory of what she dislikes.

I'm so glad you remember ray's defense, too.

One hilarious dude was also defending "grill it 'til it's tender" lady, which... just... my brain.

People still do this? The last time I saw someone do this was in high school, and he was copying people's AIM names to start drama.

Oh Jesus

Dear God, I read it the same way. Only when I read your comment did I realize differently.

Anyway, for you, I recommend a strong, red wine and plenty of dinner rolls. Sangria will also do, but try to avoid hard liquor because you will want to take big swallows frequently, and I don't want you to die or go to the ER.

Or the one where your mother-in-law turns your quiet, low-key dinner into something else entirely by saying she's bringing along her sister and inviting your father-in-law's girlfriend. That's right, her ex-husband's girlfriend. Oh, and despite the fact that she says she'll take care of the reservations, she won't,…

Tell me more.

The word you're looking for is caterwauling.

Protip: If your "joke" is so stupid that you have to insist you were joking, then just keep being the joke. At least some part of the mess will be funny, in that case.

Yes, their names are definitely why those guys are struggling. For sure.

I don't think people consciously decide to scream and wail and freak out.

Hush your mouth. It's football, but with free added comedy. I want it to go on forever.

Came here just to say this.

Oh... God. No.

Well, if I had to guess, I'd say they start out DMing strangers because they're willing to give people a chance, particularly if these gals are hockey fans and want to talk hockey, or maybe because friendship (and more) really can come from any quarter, provided people aren't fucking asshats from three minutes into…