Everyone, male and female, is conditioned in some way by their upbringing, their environment, their family, their schooling, etc. No one's immune to it. And there's a difference between an excuse and an explanation. I don't think her choice requires an excuse. I think she handled it in the least risky way possible.

You're right. The soft touch sucks. That's why it shouldn't be one of those things that women are conditioned to do so they can avoid being called names, harassed and demeaned for having some fucking standards. And yet, it is.

The issue here is that she needed to parse whether, by today's standards, this is actually a shitty and weird thing to do. And that's the sad state of affairs— when a guy does something that offends you, you have to sit and think about it and parse it and pick it apart to see if maybe you're the crazy one, because if…

I pointed out it was tasteless and insensitive. The difference is, it's not actionable in the way that being homophobic and bigoted is actionable when you are in control of the employment, compensation and livelihood of others. And if you truly believe THAT is "better" somehow than making gross, tasteless jokes…

As much as I think the jokes he made sound idiotic and insensitive, the difference is that he's not a coach in a position of power of a lot of other people, and he's not in a position to hire/fire/discriminate based on sexuality. Also, making jokes about pedophila =/= homophobic. Insensitive, yes. Tasteless, yes. …

If I feel I'm talking in circles, or talking too much, I will stop and say "Am I making sense, or is this all total nonsense?" I feel like I usually catch myself, but who am I kidding? I like Question Session, though. Filing that one away for later.

All's good, there's no way to reply to entire threads. No offense taken— and in fairness, my initial post wasn't well put.

Totally agree. That's why I've indicated in most of my posts that no one is the winner in this situation because they're both acting like complete and total idiots. The spreadsheet was a dick move, and one that won't get them anywhere. She even says he only vents any anger and expresses displeasure once or twice a…

I love your username.

I did clarify a little more later on— she's delusional if she thinks it's normal and that they're both in the same place, mentally and emotionally, about this. She acts like this came out of left field. But if her husband was suggesting/requesting/initiating sex multiple times a week and she was giving him "nos"…

I probably overtalk the hell out of everything in my marriage, but I do it so my husband never feels like he gets to this point. Because it's sad when people feel they can't talk to each other, or they do and neither of them are hearing it. What a bummer.

Yeah, the "stay married" thing was full sarcasm. I'm not even sure it's mismatched sex drives, though, so much as bad assumptions on both sides.

I just can't understand the rationale of "I'm going to track all of this on a spreadsheet" instead of "I'm going to tell her I'm really unhappy with our sex life." I mean, you took the time and energy to record, verbatim, what answer you were given when... it just seems like the more natural action would be to say…

I'm sorry, I should have phrased it better— it's normal to have lags, sure. But it's also normal to try to work on it and to at least acknowledge it's going on. It sounds like she just assumed they were both going through the lag even though he was still asking. That's where she's delusional. If he's proposing sex…

Though this quote from the entire trainwreck really is eye-opening:

This chick is apparently delusional if she thinks it's fine and normal to get that infrequent with physical intimacy, but not communicating it to her— when he was apparently aware enough of his dissatisfaction to start a stupid fucking spreadsheet— also makes him a total bag of dicks.

It looks like she was making another freakin' lunge at him, so... yeah, even if she HADN'T been, if you touch my junk, you get what you get in return. No, no, nope.

I... did not ever, in any way, in any universe need to read "Jason Biggs' penis." Blagh. You're right. Appetite suppressant.

Not to defend this woman— clearly, she's not absorbing anything— but when you're tasked with continuing to talk and filling the silence on air, your mouth is most often a few steps ahead of your brain, even if you're smart, competent and articulate.

Aaron Sanchez of Food Network... so much... aaaaaaugh.