Fucking new money.

Yeah, the problem with that conspiracy theory (not saying you’re advocating it) is that Matt Ryan would have to be in on it (no audibling to more run plays) and that fluke fumble bounce has to go right to the Patriots, on top of a million other things that would have be orchestrated perfectly to not look suspicious.…

The Panthers boned themselves the year before that, too, when their idiot kicker put the kickoff out of bounds and gave the Pats the ball on the 40 yard line, needing only a field goal.

Like the WYTS articles themselves, there is just only so much new to say each year. After like 5 years of these, we’ve covered all the bases with most teams, so the only new stuff to riff on is a handful of offseason roster moves, shenanigans from the previous season, and whoever the new coaches are if applicable.

Is it a MLB bylaw that all umpires must have at least 3 chins?

You forgot Terrelle Pryor.

Albert needs to come to a dolphinitive decision and stick to it.

but it’s at least a grand too high

So she stumbled?

And the other thing that makes me skeptical of Bolt is that he was torching by several tenths of a second the rest of the world’s elite sprinters, a lot of whom were later found to have been doping during those races. It’s just really hard to believe that someone who is clean is smoking a field of elite sprinter…

So both bat flipping and bird flipping are against the unwritten rules?

Also Derek Fisher has 6 rings, so he must also be better than LeBron.

This is the best passage:

As a non-Patriots-fan/hater, fuck Kyle “5 running plays with a 25 point 2nd half lead” Shanahan forever.

I wouldn’t go after a guy who is actively pissing. That’s a good way to get pissed on. Also, you’re in a locked cage, so whatever you start with the crazy drunk could end poorly for you. It’s much better to just let that go.

Holy shit. +1

If you guys haven’t seen Tour de Pharmacy on HBO, his character in it is hilarious. Just be ready for the scene of him carrying a naked man on his back with the guy’s junk right next to his ear.

Daniel Sturridge is generally very good when he’s healthy, but unfortunately, he’s almost never healthy.

You just made me realize I’ve never seen overalls on a casual Friday. While I don’t work in an industry with this (healthcare doesn’t have such things), I 100% support someone busting out a pair of overalls because I can’t recall any dress code from my previous office life forbidding them on casual Friday. Loophole.…

Baseball injuries are the weirdest. I have no idea how swinging a bat injures your neck when you are a pro athlete.