This sounds like Taken but with a pig.

Gee, thanks so much for the condescending lecture, I wasn’t aware beans existed?! (rolls eyes)

I’m surprised they’re reaching out to anyone about anything.

I give a shit.  It’s almost like not every article is tailored to you.

Well, it is true that after the massive heart attack you will stop having explosive diarrhea.

thank you, I’m sure all 4 year olds around here who are still developing the synapses required to absorb information and perform the minimal amount of critical thinking needed to recognize that this baseball replay isn’t an actual videogame mechanic defined by its physical impossibility will benefit from your post

You’re right. I should have somehow magically ascertained that you are a lawyer in the state of Florida. I apologize for not recognizing that immediately. You are the real victim here.

As a current nicotine addict, I can confidently say that your statement is untrue. I go out of my way to keep my nasty habit from affecting others. 

The Root with the hard-hitting journalism of going after Ellie Kemper and Lin-Manuel Miranda for racism.

LMM has done more to promote minorities on stage and screen than anyone else in the last dozen years or so. Too fucking bad if there’s not enough of a particular minority featured in “In the Heights” - he shouldn’t have to apologize for shit.

Just because you aren’t paying attention doesn’t mean it mentioned oh, every year for months on end.

There’s a huge difference between Apple submitting to legal requests from the authorities and Apple preventing third parties from collecting your data for the purposes of advertising to you, and you know it.

Not sure it’s reasonable to say Rodgers flat out “isn’t smart enough”, nor is actually being smart a pre-req to host a show like that. Trebek hosted like 37 game shows before he came to Jeopardy!, he was chosen cause he was a game show host, not a Mensa member.

I love how the article tries to insinuate that it was terrible that she took a week to respond to this manufactured controversy. Y’all ought to be ashamed of yourselves.

Oh man, you didn’t check in to see how this insane stretch of a nothing-burger was getting roasted over at The Root? Cause it’s getting no traction there, and it feels like their readership should know.

I care about all humans, even asshole humans like you.

I feel like the real story involves some mediocre blogger being denied an exclusive. 

Wow. Jeeze. Show me on the doll where the bad man touched you.

You might wanna look again:

Dude averaged 25 a night in DC and put a lot of asses in seats here. If the teammates you failed to name were dumb enough to gamble their own money away, that’s on them... And you definitely didn’t name the other party in the “guns in the locker room” story, Javaris Crittenton. The longest…

Here’s hoping the Lakers stay healthy. I want to watch Lebron mow down the Warriors, Suns, Clippers, Jazz and beat the Sixers for the Championship. After that, watch the haters (like skip) find something to criticize. GOAT James.