Devastated.  I have been counting on the reward program to finally be able to enjoy a full meal at Taco Bell, after decades of longing, and now this.

I have that debate every office Christmas party.  “Hello it is not within the realm of physics for this cork to fly off.”  Yet they still fear the cork.

If you can’t digest it a light bulb goes off in your head and you realize you can never ingest it again.

Obviously attributable to the Dunn-Whitmore Centrifical Vortex effect.

Anchovy Ice Cream or GTFO.

“Is there anything you would recommend?” accomplishes the same thing while not being dickish.

I was under the impression that boneless wings came from chickens with no bones in their wings.

Public Enemy Number One

I’m going to be like my paranoid dad who didn’t buy a microwave until 2002 and wait until 2034 to buy an air fryer.

I thought everybody loved Donkey Sauce.

If only we had brussel sprouts made out of pork.

What I do with parents begging for money with their kids at the entrance of the Publix store is to give them some money and not accept whatever they are trying to sell.  That way we both wind up happy.

My first job in high school was an ice cream shop in a mall and for years I couldn’t even stand to look at a hot fudge sundae.

ND the new one costs $62k why pay so much for a six year old one?

I don’t see how these are a meat substitute unless you consider potatoes to be meat (“I brought down a potato from 40 years with a .223 rifle, totally clean kill, gutted it and roasted it whole”).

They should liven it up by offering really weird snacks like half a cucumber or an orange peel.

My lasting memory of Subway was in 2004 where we were getting hit with tropical storms and hurricanes one after another, I hadn’t had power for a couple days and those cans of Sterno really don’t do much, I wanted real food, hot food. So I ventured out in my car which was probably illegal, downed tree branches and…

Okay here is the problem. Say you are Big Grocery Chain and you sell a LOT of beef, pork and chicken. And you put the plant-based stuff in the meat section. Now the Big Meat Company tells you “Take that **** somewhere else or we’re selling our best products to a competing chain, and giving you the second-rate stuff.”

Wh…

Just last week a learned how it is actually pronounced 

When I want to eat something other than meat I eat vegetables.