What happens to a dream deferred? 
Does grow inside you until it mutates your DNA giving you the power to manipulate dreams, thus becoming your tenuous origin story?

This summer, Samuel L. Jackson IS Zora Neale Hurston.

At least it's better than Shart Week.

I used to live near that shop - they're really nice folks who are genuinely fascinated by the strange things they're selling.

Grandma's Hands is just an unappetizing name for ladyfingers that have been baked too long.

I use the "dork on the Office" vs. "chicken farmer on Portlandia" mnemonic.

Isn't that Spielberg's contemporary re-telling of the Grapes of Wrath?

Is Lindsay Lohan still considered a "hot woman" among the straights? 
I thought she was stricken from the sexy list for her 30-going-on-crack-addled-70 look.

Bending over for the fad diets of others is nacho responsibility.

The Mamas & the Papas in space.

I dunno, if Bioshock has taught us anything, it's that underwater cities inevitable attract Randian assholes.

I was hen-pecked for several months… I eventually got so fed up, I demanded my landlord hire a chicken exterminator.

It's true: he's the voice that says "Beef: It's What's For Dinner". If that's not America's #1 celebrity, I don't know who is! 

That's Zac Efron R.N., to you buddy!

Favorite Sam Elliott moment:
His cameo (is he famous enough to do cameos?) as the airline president in Up in The Air.

[G train conductor voice]: skrxxzz shkkrxxxzzz shkshk.

I think I'd have to pick Jeff Goldblum for that.

They are 9:30-5:00, closed on Mondays and Holidays.

Also they fly a plane UNDER a subway train.

Morgan Freeman is the care-worn second-term incarnation Jamie Foxx's president. His administration just has really bad luck.