I like the formula, but sweet, sufferin’ jebus, if you’re going to “transcribe” an interview, at least hire a fucking proofreader. The blatant language fuck-ups ruined a lot of the experience for me.

Poor Rosie. She’s never been the same since the recapture.

I also love that the yokel portion (which is alarmingly big, and doesn’t always live in the woods) of The American Public™ is now trying trying to figure out what they just did: “Boy, turn off that Honey Booboo show for ONE NIGHT, and then this happens!”

Take some sunscreen, a big ol’ hat, a pickanick basket with some nice wine and lots of water, and a good bong, and spend the afternoon. Honestly, I bet we could learn more in an afternoon sitting beside an actual tide pool with a book explaining tide pool shit than we could in a week in a classroom. All the better if…

Thanks for your angry and incisive input, Ernest Hemingway.

WEIRD! And I may be the only person in this comment section who’s not using the term sarcastically.

A couple of other commenters also provided some pretty good reasons that I’d never even considered, but I thknk yours is the best. Cheers.

A couple of other commenters also provided some pretty good reasons that I’d never even considered, but I thknk…

“If lil’Kim succeeds in reunification”

This right here. The end of apartheid was coming, and even the Afrikaaners knew that leaving nukes in the hands of their coming overlords would be a VERY FUCKING BAD IDEA indeed. Sure, Zulus with nukes. What could possibly go wrong?

Nah, bought by the Chinese so they can try to get a grasp on how scientific research (and printing, and beautiful bookbinding, and illustration) is actually done, and when they can’t figure it out, they will quietly burn it with gritted teeth as a symbol of “Western Ideology”, and then go back to just stealing others’…

Full points to the “producers” for making the alleged bite look like yet another porn vagina, though.

“South African scientist Michael Gaylard”

Umm, not to point out the obvious, but THAAD was presented from the get-go as a counter for the norks. Come on, man. Whitewashing doesn’t help anyone.

Whereas my guess is zero. The previous president had to go, and this was the next viable alternative. If he can calm things down (and it appears that he may), then so much the better. Other than that, this “story” is nothing but speculation and bullshit.

This right here. And for an additional 5 minutes and another 500 dollars, they’ll give you a slideshow about THE HORRORS THAT CAN ENSUE that will make you wish you’d just stayed home that day.

This part made me laugh: “In the UAE, we live in a rough neighborhood”

Underrated post.

Ooh, I like the first theory. Evidence is still out for obvious reasons on the second one, though, since we haven’t even met any of them yet.

I’ve always thought it much more likely that aliens would just see Earth as a resource for fresh protein on long interstellar journeys, like old-timey sailors used to look forward to on long voyages.