Wrong! The Grammys have always been about looking outrageous. The Oscars are where you look classy.

I’ve loved him since he was on a sitcom with Diana Canova back in the ’70s.

How ’bout you just don’t watch it, asshole?

Memoirs of a Professional Cad, by George Sanders, the saturnine Addison DeWitt from All About Eve. He was a terrific writer, very funny. Plus he was married to Zsa Zsa Gabor, so he tells stories about her, too.

This is such a weird angle of attack. If Obama knows exactly what he’s doing, why hasn’t he done it already? He’s been in office for eight years; he’s fixin’ to walk out the door.

That’s what he said!

Hey, now! Feria was some great shit once upon a time. I was a hair model in the ’80s, and I got the greatest color EVAR from a Feria rep.

The airports can re-purpose their smoking rooms. Nashville had one for years. I think they furnished it with leftovers from the old airport. It looked like a set from The Rockford Files.

I used to have a thing about Dr. Quinn. I lived for the reruns on late-night after Tom Snyder. It was a balm on my frazzled nerves.

I had an old Mason jar with a glass lid and wire hasp full of potpourri on my toilet tank.

And chintz! With huge cabbage roses! I was going to make myself a suit of chintz with big roses on my boobs. I was inspired by Chris Izaak.

I had some nasty perfume that my brother gave me for Christmas, and I sprayed it on my lightbulbs on the regular. I think I exploded one once.

You can get all the pancakes you want this Tuesday, as long as you’re willing to darken the doors of your local mainline Protestant church. Damn near every Lutheran/Episcopalian/Methodist/UCC church in the country is having a pancake supper on Tuesday, and they’ll be happy to have uninvited guests.

I get so sick of this shit, people assuming every actor on God’s Green Earth is submitting to all kinds of extraordinary procedures to stay looking young.

Sadly, no! I lived in Nashville for years, and dutifully voted in all the obscure local elections. Voted against the stadium. There was a deal where the NFL Team had to sell enough PSLs to justify building the stadium. They didn’t, but the team came anyway, and the city paid for the stadium.

You do know lots of things are made of cotton, even organic cotton, right?

Hey now! You leave my man JC out of this! He has nothing to do with it, believe me.

It’s not a matter of technophobia, I’m 90% sure a film has to have at least a brief run in actual theaters in order to be eligible.

Did you read her actual comments, or just the headline?

Actually, at my (Lutheran) churches, we’ve always had mid-week services with soup suppers during Lent. Catholics go back to fish on Fridays, too.