I caramelize onions in my slow cooker and freeze them.

I’ve been making creme fraiche, myself. Easy-peasy, unless it gets cold and you haven’t turned on the heat yet.

A lot of people dig mashed cauliflower! You might try them on their own before besmirching your meat layer with something you might not like.

I have a recipe for umami-ing up turkey burgers that includes soy sauce, sardines, and Vegemite. There’s also Maggi seasoning, which my Seventh Day Adventist-raised vegetarian friend likes a lot.

My church had Oktoberfest, and it sounded like everybody was going to bring hot potato salad or sauerkraut, so I chose to make a kohlrabi (and potato) gratin.

SYNERGY!

All y’all youngun’s going for safety razors are cute, but there’s a reason my mom (God rest her soul) and millions like her leapt at the Daisy razor back in the day.

All y’all youngun’s going for safety razors are cute, but there’s a reason my mom (God rest her soul) and millions…

I know, right? I just caught an old episode of PBS’s History Detectives that told the whole story. It really is interesting, with near-religious devotion to economic philosophy and skulduggery and patent attorneys!

What? So a late-night talk show host is supposed to go all Mike Wallace on people? That’s just dumb.

She did nothing of the sort. Why are you making shit up?

Yeah, science and dumbass.

Bless his heart.

Thank you. I just did the typesetting for studies that proved/disproved “common sense” when I worked for a pediatric medical journal.

There are credentials that can be stripped. Andrew Wakefield, the jackhole behind the MMR-autism study, cannot practice medicine ever again.

My mom died of a massive heart attack at 70. My pastor’s dad, who was in his 80s, said, “That’s so young.”

Yeah, I don’t cotton to just banning her from speaking. Hear her out! Argue with her! She’s a tough old broad! She can take it!

I worked at a music mag in the mid-’90s, and the word back then was that she really wanted to get married, but he was still playing the field. Of course, No Doubt hadn’t broken just yet, and Bush was a big act.

His mama is a Harpeth Hall girl, so he comes by it honestly. HH is the fanciest girls’ school in Nashville.

Politics is not where one looks for cutting-edge graphic design. Her logo is pretty swanky compared to most.

Even my old employers in Tennessee, a right-to-work-for-less state, got their asses handed to them for not paying people overtime. They’re so fucked.