Wire hangers?!?

She must know my mom, who makes me throw out the wire hangers they give you at the dry cleaners.

Christ on a cracker...do you write all the time...and if not, why aren't you writing like ALL the time?!?!?!

Thank you for taking the time to read, much less comment so generously.

I would like to subscribe to your newsletter and, quite possibly, your life.

I have a theory about people who become wildly successful/famous on the level that Steve has achieved: their relationship with their past, pre-fame and success, is an either or proposition. Either they embrace it. Or they shed it like a snake sheds its skin, leaving it in the middle of the road, to dry up and blow…

Anyone who tells kids to "ignore them and they'll go away" clearly was never bullied. Ignoring them just makes them try harder. I was bullied by a girl a year younger than me, and channeling my inner stoic ONLY MADE HER WORSE. She ended up tripping me while we were running laps in the parking lot for volleyball,…

You win, you win, you win. Unless you're a 75 year old woman who thinks every black guy is OJ Simpson. Than you win even more.

We have a winner. Shut it down.

My dress was a sample. I told everyone when they complimented me on it because I am my Nannie and I'm genetically required to tell people when I got a deal. "THANKS, I GOT IT FOR A THIRD OF THE REGULAR PRICE BECAUSE IT WAS THE SAMPLE EVERYONE TRIED ON."

Three highlights stand out for me:

Gillian is majestic while Dakota is painfully plain.

That's because you only go on pizza night

Haha, I was definitely imagining someone dumping one of those little packets of active dry yeast on their popcorn.

Thank you so much for saying these things. We recently just had our wedding, paid for it ourselves, had a guest list of around 200. Yes, we paid around $50k for our wedding, but we were engaged for 2 years, together for 12. I think we'll be just fine thanks.

I've never been, but those Shane Co. radio ads sure are persuasive. Actually, I just love that guy's voice.

What??? *throws doorknob a ring out window, files for divorce*

They were going for Pfizer Blue (Pantone Matching System 285) and failed.

Good point, but somebody needs to tell me where those couples keep finding the outdoor bathtubs.

Oh, for crissake. This has nothing to do with sophistication - and everything to do with the structural integrity of old, old bridges. The locks are damaging the structures, and have caused some railings to collapse.

It's vandalism.