“Travel”

Judging by the bio, Hardy has animosity toward anything with a period.

The Kings really are fucked, but they’ve been in town for 30 years so at least we know it wasn’t by the mayor.

I guess Aqib Talib can join Peyton Manning and Jason Pierre Paul on the list of athletes who have no idea what the ends of their fingers are doing.

The sex stuff this new generation is doing is out of control. Eye play?! That’s dangerous. Someone could go blind. In my day, the only kinky thing we did was watch The Mary Tyler Moore Show while making whoopie on the sofa. If you looked at the screen at the wrong time, sure, you’d climax to Ed Asner, but the worst…

Sick of hearing professional athletes brag about their extravagant lifestyles and 18-passenger cars.

The Panthers are 7-1 and are going to the championship what are you even talking about

This is an important story to report, because Hardy’s brother was in the driver’s seat. Talking to the media is not important, especially when there are unsolved crimes for the Hardy boys to investigate.

Carolina is 7-1

“Dammit! Count it! C’mon, man! I fucking need this!"—Tim Donaghy

At least now when I yell out “Kobe!” when shooting anything into a garbage can it will be realistic.

I thought the only shots Bryan Scott wanted were long 2’s?

I haven’t worked security in a long time, but the one thing you didn’t do was get involved with what was happening outside your venue.

Particularly getting involved in a he said/she said argument.

I’m truly sorry this lady had a shit night involving some apparent assholes. But sacking people for not being chivalrous…

Counterpoint:

So was Kevin. [Written in black marker on a piece of athletic tape]

“Why don’t you put the word ‘did’ in front of it?” he said. “And then a question mark at the end of it.”

Fan: Hey Roger, show us a cool trick you can do with a racket!

JESUS CHRIST DAD USE 807 NOT 7 YOU ARE PAYING COMCAST $250 A MONTH