Please, dude. The only way this post could be trolling harder is if it were a stout little plastic figurine with neon hair that you could sculpt into various configurations.

Damn, HGH is some serious shit aint it?

You think tiger is better than jack? Lol

All of those statistics make it even sadder that Bonds had to cheat and then lie so extensively. He could have never touched a steroid, PED, whatever else and still been one of the greatest overall players of all time. At the same time, his personality and jerkiness make it easy not to care too much that he squandered…

blah blah the moralizing black and white narrative foisted on us by self-righteous sportswriters blah blah blah. Marvel at his numbers-fine but don't try to tell me he brought us joy (he was a joyless dick), or that he was the greatest baseball player of all time (debatable, but hard to support-Ruth accumulated more…

He was a pretty terrible outfielder in his later years.

"f Bonds had retired after the 1998 season, he would have done so with 99.6 career rWAR. This would rank him No. 32 all-time." And he would have been a unanimous, first ballot HOF pick in 2003. Instead, he got greedy and (along with a lot of other on- and off-field participants) kind of fucked up half-a-generation…

Not EVERYONE was on something. Quit making it sound like it was totally ok to be on the cream and clear. The Mitchell Report stated that as of 2003 up to 7% of the players tested positive and named 89 former or current MLB players that tested positive. Even if there was a huge error margin or there was the…

Every generation gets the Pete Rose it deserves

You still wear a Livestrong bracelet I see.

"Bonds had four sacrifice hits in his career."

Four hats were also sacrificed during his career due to some unusual head circumference increases.

It's clear he was the cream of the crop.

Then stop cutting your goddamn sandwiches wrong.

Always cut your burger diagonally

Its not hard to understand how a wealth apologizing, corporate shill would miss the point entirely.

Kluwe (to my knowledge) isn't gay, so he can't be making a hostile work environment claim based on sexual orientation (you typically need to be part of the protected class).

Mariah is so gross.

Hey, if I were married to Nick Cannon, I'd cry a lot too.

Crazy how unattractive Mariah Carey really is.

She is a thick woman who has had two kids and she's dressing like...I don't even know. Paris Hilton back in the day. Those are very poorly chosen outfits.