It’s not a big deal. A black bar in a photo just means you have 72 hours to find and kill all of your blood relatives or Lizzie rises from the grave to drag you, screaming, into Hell.

This election has me convinced I never want to find birth family. What if they’re the type of people who would vote for Donald Trump? I was born in South Carolina after all.

Since I can’t star, have a drink instead:

I was interviewed for this show- a friend of mine and I found out that we were actually half sisters (my mom had given her up for adoption, I knew about it but not who, years and years later friend and I have a random conversation and oh look at that, my mysterious half sis is my friend, who I met in my 30's). We…

I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED FOR THIS TRAILER!!! THIS MOVIE LOOKS LIKE SO MUCH FUCKING FUN AND I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED AND CAN’T WAIT TO BRING MY KID!!!

Well to be fair, Cheryl Tiegs is sixty-eight now, a full 40 years older than the target of her preposterous sniping. I don’t want to hate on her because she’s no longer young and lush and ... jesus christ look at Ashley Graham’s FACE. Sorry, got distracted. Anyway. I will, however, hate on her for being a…

A new hair line, a fresh coat of “Just for men,” and a Botox brow lift did wake him. You’re also correct about the soul loss.

Hopefully he looks better than he did a couple weeks ago when he looked “awake but dead inside.”

Isn’t it pretty much agreed upon that when you see this:

lol @ Emergen-K

I got Kanye once for about 3 weeks back in ‘07. My left arm has been in constant pain ever since. Apparently spending g that much time patting yourself on the back has at least some minor drawbacks.

Is there anything you can take when you get Kanye? Antibiotiks?

All that Kim’s post seems to be saying in my opinion is that they have the kind of relationship that requires her to constantly baby her husband. She wrote an entire blog post (or whatever you want to call her website) praising pretty much every single thing her husband does. “Kanye this, Kanye that. I wish everyone…

Silk smoking/jogging suit! Would wear ironically. Love the “You’ve come a long way, baby!” patch.

Cocaine also works! Don't think it'd be advertised in a magazine though.

get skinny and stay skinny the natural way, folks. with a crippling nicotine addiction! enjoy this matching virginia slim outfit to wear when you accidentally cough up a piece of your lung

Why can’t Oprah let it go and love and accept herself the way she is?

Good psychics are rare.

I have a ton of their clothes because they’re well made, last forever, fit well, and are appropriate for work. I don’t hate myself. I do have a job that requires me to have a reasonable business casual wardrobe and I don’t want to spend my life hunting down khakis and cardigans, especially when I can just order a new…

My grandmother got these catalogs. The clothing looks exactly like you’d expect women who are offended by women’s equality to like; square, depressing, boring, expensive, ugly-ass shit. It’s clothing for people who hate themselves.