outcast “coalitions” of two to four male lions don’t get to have sex with females until their take over a pride.

Remember, guys, homosexuality is unnatural like glasses, cars, airplanes, surgery, indoor plumbing, Viagra, television, the internet, cell phones, air conditioning, space travel, and getting vaccinated against small pox.

Right? It’s like Vanderpump Rules but with presidents.

The best part is that it’s subtle and done in a way that can be easily explained as not intended to be shade at him. I think they’re all just very happy they don’t have to do the political shit any more and see each other as people who survived the system.

Tangent:

They announced their engagement at the Met Ball last year and got married this weekend - InStyle has a piece on it, but I haven’t seen pictures yet.

If I were her friend who gave her the kidney, I’d be like “I will take that back now, thanks!”

That was Correa that got engaged at the World Series. Verlander and Upton did indeed get married in Italy this weekend.

My uncle used to date a woman who one day told me she was going to church while holding a copy of The Holy Bible for Children. I said “That is nice, you are going to teach the Bible to the children there” pointing at it. She looked confused and said that was just her Bible, cause she didn’t like “the one with the big…

The line “I swear to God the other presidents are girl-squadding Donald Trump” was the best thing I’ve read in awhile.

Did she forget she had to go to rehab to break up with him the first time? Selena, honey, you can do so much better! Dump him now, for your kidney’s sake.

Also, a private jet must be a bitch to gift wrap. Where do you find a big enough bow?

What Oprah should get her is a Net Jet card so Gayle can live that private jet lifestyle without the ongoing maintenance costs. It’s only practical.

The fact that the former presidents are either inadvertently or purposely mean girling 45 makes me smile for a moment. If I had more skill I would edit the “you can’t sit with us” to have the presidents’ faces.

“And now we come to God’s teen angst phase where he decided to kill every living thing on the planet except for one human family, of which everyone must then surely come from, and their floating menagerie.”

I think the one problem with asking for a private plane for Christmas is that it’s one of those gifts that is going to cost you in the long run. Oprah surely wouldn’t also be paying all the associated costs (pilots, fuel, etc.) each time Gayle wanted to fly somewhere, right?

As if Bieber has read any part of the Bible except the blurb and maybe the “about the author” inlay.

“after Justin began courting Selena a few months back when she had her kidney transplant.”