BRING ON THE SCOTAL SAGAS, MY COMPATRIOTS.

Asking for that goddamned dressing in a Michelin-starred restaurant is peak Ranch Abuse.

hah! i don't understand how people think that denying someone a future of their abusive behavior is a threat.

Ah, sweet irony. My dad (who is probably writhing in hell right now) would not recognize himself as one of the kind of jerks depicted here, served in the Navy and would have definitely enjoyed the runny eggs story. But I can only imagine how many of his former servers could have written stories about him.

Where was the semen? I really was expecting semen!

one thing i love about bco is after it gets posted, people flood it with more awesome stories. it's the gift that keeps on giving.

I read this a little fast the first time and thought the kid was a five year old. Read it again and nope. Definitely a teenager. Thank god for that granddad.

I once worked in a hospital, the same one as my dad, but as a lowly receptionist. This nurse was so horrible to me, shouted at me, belittled me etc. The next day she comes in, all sweetness and light, calling me darling etc., as she's worked out my surname (which is a pretty unusual one) is the same one as my dad's,…

I was serving a grandfather and his teenage grandson. The kid asked for a bowl of chili, at which point I explained that we were out of chili, apologized (why we as servers have to do this, I don't know, but we do) and told him the other soups we had available. The kid said, "But I wanted the chili." Ok, well,…

I just threw up a little bit thinking about ranch dressing on shrimp.

Ah, blessed be thine BCO. A maker of Mondays.

"Now, that first story might not seem to be some huge righteous vengeance,..."

WHY CAN I ONLY COMMENT ON 25% OF POSTS RIGHT NOW???

No kidding - My thumbs and psyche are still scarred from the "Orange Clove Pomander Balls" I was forced to make at Christmas from 1976-1982.

My mom always says when she's hungover, "I was overserved." Like it wasn't she, herself, pouring glass after glass of Chardonnay. I like this because it tricks yourself into thinking you're not the one to blame.

Meanwhile in Mexico:

Self-restraint is real power.

I wish the video was a couple seconds longer to show off the score.

I would be willing to bet that in SiS case, she is having an affair...