My goddamn internet is taking forever and a day to load anything.

My friend watched Big Trouble in Little China for the first time 3 years back. He was basically saying that it was super racist. (He's Korean-American, I'm Chinese-American.) I said, it was the 80s, and I'm pretty certain that Big Trouble in Little China cast more Asian actors than all the other movies Hollywood put…

I was rooting for his character. And also Terry Crews.

Maybe one will fall off an internet truck that was on the way to deliver it to someone else's internet.

Looks like Zach was right.

Grunka-lunka-dunkedy-dedient….

t-shit.

I had one of these, and honestly, if you just folded up the "shell", I think it would have tasted exactly the same. It overpowered everything inside. It wasn't bad, but, I'm just gonna go get fried chicken instead.

It's actually a search engine, but only for luxuries. If that product you're searching for doesn't cost more than $1,000, it just returns no search results.

Man, if only this dickbag got punched out of CPAC instead.

"Awwwww maaaaaan!"

To be fair, the league's finest punters are generally rugby players.

Oh my god, you ignorant fool.

Hannibal Buress has a great bit on the intentional walk.

Since most of them just sous vide or Jaccard now, I AM actually at that point.

I've always liked this article to illustrate that concept:

I don't understand the clams in shells on pizza. I'm not going to separate out the clams to eat the pizza. Just take them out and put them in the sauce or something. Otherwise, I just have 2 separate appetizers, and possibly shell granules in my breadstick appetizer.

Fucking Delmonico's in Vegas. I was THIIIIIS close to asking for A1. Shittiest "high-end" steak I've ever had in my life. Hands down.

I could see the scallop and bacon pizza being pretty good. They do a lot of baked scallop "sushi" here. Lobster seems like it'd just be pricey, but not as flavorful as other toppings.

Name some combos that you've had that bear this out. I occasionally put shrimp on mine, but I can't ever remember thinking it was anything above average.