LEAVE TEDDY ALONE!

I blame the injury on the airbag not deploying during the Carr crash.

I’m just waiting for Teddy to throw an ‘OK’ sign.

“But if it comes in summer, I’ll be waiting for it at Nats Park, Section 128, hard by the Dippin’ Dots.”

There’s a difference between rooting for the local team (I moved to DC in 2012 and I root for the Nationals in the rare moments I care about the baseball standings!) and choosing to become fanatical.

This is a fair point (disclosure: I have a Nats hat and have been to several games at the park).

The thing that adds to the weirdness, or maybe, driving the weirdness, is that no one over age 24 has grown up rooting for the Nationals. All those weirdo conservative elites decided, as adults with presumably existing baseball allegiances, chose to get obsessed about the Nats because they’re old white people who…

So ultranationals are Ultra-Nationals fans?

You tried to explain this to a 27 year old with an analogy about being old and approaching death?  Yeah, he’s not gonna identify with that.

“It’s like you’re a very healthy 80 year old. You feel good, you’re slower than you used to be, but you’re doing OK. But, you know you’re going to die relatively soon. Statistically, it’s inevitable. Time comes for all.”

the Patriots, as currently constructed, are slow as shit.

Dan, this is a service you provide. Thank you!

Is Supreme the new Ed Hardy?

I LOVED the Rex Ryan “Men, MEN!” too. I miss that. But I am willing to give this a chance.

I just hope Rex makes a cameo this season.

Your level of pay depends on how closely you match up to Weebay from “The Wire”.

But he loves missing TD’s. 

Give it a week. That tweet will disappear and we’ll be treated to a podcast where he prattles on for 45 minutes about how he had advocated for this trade and that Gordon just needed structure and a fresh start.

Right on time:

No, my good sir. No. He was never more exciting than peak Adrian Peterson. Hell, he wasn’t more exciting than peak Arian Foster or Chris Johnson. He’s been very, very good and very available for very long. That’s impressive enough. 

Amazing. I want this fire to burn all season.