ESPN 30 for 30 presents: Three Tugs and a Cloud of Dust: The Manipulation of Robert Kraft 

What a coincidence. I don’t want to see a video of Robert Kraft getting a hand job. I happen to like having eyeballs.

They screwed up the wordplay with the song lyric too. It has a picture of a goat dressed like Michael Jackson on it, but the original line is Billie Jean is NOT my lover.

I went and did the googling because this bothered me way too much. The sixth is Billy Goat is my Lover.  Maybe it’s not included in the press release because doubling down on goat cheese is lame.

Jesus! Even more evidence of Russia meddling with our erections.

It’s just a cookie. 

Filipina nannies know how to make those delicious Tagalog Cookies. 

Plasco-Flaxman claims that they had a bad experience with the nanny immediately preceding Maurice, and that nanny just so happened to be black, so this time, they were hoping not to get another black, but to instead get a Filipina.

This is actually quite logical.

I tend not to comment on women’s appearances but... do conservatives just have a little tree that cruel-looking blond women bud from?

Well there is the shotgun and the pistol for starters.

Video games do pose a tremendous hazard to our nation’s children. Even now, as a 40-year old man, I still find myself jumping on turtles, eating wild mushrooms, and climbing down random sewer pipes.

Can we also take a moment for Doocey saying that the guy “started shooting with a real gun” after losing a game? Does he think there are guns in Madden?

I tend not to comment on women’s appearances but... do conservatives just have a little tree that cruel-looking blond women bud from?

Video games. The NFL. Disaffected young men with mental problems. Chicago pizza.

You mean the Officially Licensed Denver Broncos controller?

Maybe we can set you up with Tab?

The FGC in general gets screwed compared to the MOBA and the FPS ones.

I have a bold idea: how about governments not air their grievances toward each other via Twitter? Just talk on the fucking phone or something.