I clicked through hoping it would say something like “50% very unfavorable, 40% unfavorable and 10% murderous rage at the mention of his name” but I was disappointed.

I get it, but I also can see where making sure that stuff isn’t falling down on her would be good, too. I don’t think, in that situation, I would’ve just thrown my stuff down, but I hope I would’ve been a bit hastier about setting everything on the counter.

Thanks for the follow up! This is great news, and not just because I was right.

I won’t date a dude who is okay with dating someone in the 18-22 range. Sorry bro, but you’re not my type. When I was that age I was dating guys who are currently my age (28-32) and looking back I realize how awful those guys were, and how poor my judgement was. No thanks.

Did that guy see a woman in obvious distress and just peace the fuck out? I’d like to believe he was going to get his phone, or get help, but... maybe? Props to the clerk though for being such a fast thinker.

I love Texas in so many ways, but I'm also embarrassed by Texas in SO MANY WAYS.

I read this as “very dark brown hair, and eyes” with a pause and said out loud “how does having eyes add to the confus-oh.”

Goats are awful. You feed them day in and day out for a week, and when you show up late ONE DAY they protest by breaking the thing that holds the electric wire above the fence. And you don’t see it because it’s dark outside and when you go to open the date you get shocked so hard it knocks you on your ass. And then…

You're eatin the wrong bagels, my friend. I had to cut back on my bagel habit recently, because I was getting chubbier than I am comfortable with.

Luckily for his sake it was over the phone, because otherwise he might have disappeared, never to be heard from again.

I’m sorry, that is not at all an accurate statement of something Trump would say. He would’ve reminded his people at least 3 times how awesome he is, and I think there would’ve been at one or maybe two direct, personal insults.

If it makes you feel better, I spent multiple hours yesterday gathering excel data from our analytical reporting system, filtering, copying into google sheets, exporting into google maps, measuring distances, writing down the names on the points, copying back into excel, and sending out emails.

I had to stare for multiple seconds back and forth before figuring out it was the flower shape that was being contested.

There is no “fact” in CPAC.

Only if the mayo is gluten free.

We would no longer be friends. I just don't have time for that shit, and not enough fucks to give.

There are two sides to the “dress how you want to be addressed” in that it’s appropriate to expect someone to adhere to some basic social norms in specific situations. I.e. if you show up to a bank interview (male or female) in a tank top and shorts, you’ll likely not get the job. If you show up to a basketball game…

It reminds me of my neighbors who cry and complain about all the trash on the street, but can’t be bothered to pick a single piece of it up and throw it away. Who just a few days ago threw a cigarette butt on the ground THREE FEET from a trash can.

I’d say if he doesn’t actually believe it, it’s worse. Intentionally preying on vulnerable or easily confused people is really, really low. If he really just believes it, then he’s just crazy, and that’s sad. Can you imagine seeing evil in every corner? That everyone and everything is a lie and nothing is real? The…

IT ZIPS! WHAT THE WHAT?! But in all seriousness, this is America.