Why are you paying so much attention to what’s in other people’s carts and how they are paying? I have never once ever noticed someone paying with food stamps, because I mind my own damn business and stare at Facebook on my phone like a normal person when I’m in line at the grocery store. The only time I ever took…

At least a couple times a year I see some dipshit complaining on FB about the person in front of them paying with food stamps while tapping on an iPhone or something, or having fake nails, etc. There are MANY reasons I hate it, but I am also always like “why the hell are you peering over people’s shoulder’s when they…

When I was pregnant I went to Lane Bryant and bought 6 pair of the full coverage granny briefs that were two sizes too big and went up to my bra line almost. My son is now 10 months old. I’m still wearing them, and pretty much only them. I occasionally put on one of the other pairs and spend all day tugging and…

I have nothing against Eddie Murphy in particular, but I am puzzled by the huge amounts of praise continually heaped upon him considering his best work is 30+ years old and he’s done nothing much of consequence (aside from some pretty funny voice work in Mulan and the Shrek movies) since the early 90’s but cash…

Funny you mention Fey, because “I put the pills in the people,” done in a Cosby voice, is an exact rip-off of the same line she used hosting the Golden Globes about 10 months ago. Soo....

This is from ten years ago when I was single but it applies: I hooked up with a friend, totally pressured him into it because I was drunk and lonely (I cringe thinking about it now UGH) and fresh off a breakup. He asked me not to tell anyone because he’d also just broken up and he didn’t want her to find out.…

Same. Bud Light in a can. I’m classy.

Yes to being done with phases. Mine are only 11 months apart (yep, I’m insane) and the younger one is in such a hurry to catch up he’s hitting milestones so fast I feel like they’ll be on the same schedule soon (my oldest has been on the slower side of normal of things, didn’t walk til 18 months, etc). It’s nuts! I…

Hugs. I've got Irish Twins under 2, and holy shit do I feel you—and mine go to daycare bc we both work!! But seriously if you're really needing to drink every day you might want to look into anxiety meds instead. I started taking occasional Xanax a couple months back and it has changed my life. Child rearing stress is…

Whenever I see dresses like this I just think of the model in the “November Rain” video, because I’m 1,000 years old.

Uch, another steaming log movie with people I otherwise enjoy (Paul Bettany, for chrissake). That’s the one where she takes a 200th ranked tennis player and gets him to win Wimbledon with her magical vag. But she loses because of his bad-tennis sperm infecting her or something.

You know...it’s true she was. But weren’t some of her lines some of the most Manic Pixie bullshit that just sounded better because Frances is awesome? Has there ever been a human who has said, to a stranger, “be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid”? I believe she was quoting someone with that line (Goethe?)…

Same. I saw that one on a terrible match.com date with a man who had brown teeth (never date a person with no pictures of them smiling in their profiles!) and horrific body odor. To top it off, the movie was atrocious and I desperately wanted to walk out, but I was stuck there with this dude, marinating in his stench.…

As the daughter-in-law of a man not unlike Huckabee politically and intellectually (as in, he dumb): yep.

I wish Toby were around to take on the fucking Tea Party, is what I wish. And LEO, good god. (sniffle)

As a recent pixie convert—WORD. I don’t know what took me so long, did I think the “matted, knotted, shitty top knot, every.single.day” look was really working for me? Goddamn.

Bangs aside, can someone tell me how the hell to manage my new pixie cut? I cut about a foot of hair off after having long hair for 10 years. I love, love, love it and get compliments on it all the time. But this type of haircut sort of necessitates bangs, and I kind of hate having them! My forehead itches. They grow…

Just a PSA that everyone should be listening to Again With This, the 90210 rewatch podcast on Previously.tv. It is hysterical.

The people who say booze (combined with Xanax which works for me every time) doesn’t work are usually the people trying to sell you on a program like SOAR. I’m a white knuckler, but 2-3 cocktails and 1-2 0.5 mg Xanax (depending on the length of the flight) and I am A-OK! Usually. The last time I flew I was also…

We have reached a point in this country where the media are useless. They need to appear “unbiased” to maintain credibility, but by doing so it means they have to give equal time to a bunch of mendacious charlatans and act as if their ideas aren't actually a giant tusnami of bullshit lies.