I love you.

I just got to work (on the East Coast) after taking a red-eye from LA. I’m dangerously careening between rage and sleepy-crying. I did NOT choose a good day for this kind of adulting.

My best friend had a dream Trump was her step-dad last night.

Never be ashamed of such knowledge it’s hilarious.

I have a hair appointment tomorrow. Now I know what to ask for.

SAME!

“Elvis, you wanna cookie?” “Mroowww.”

The Lord’s work.

Ahhh she’s fine. Makes double what I make and owns her own house.

My sister did too because she has acid reflux, and it hurt her tummy to crawl. I think it’s hilarious though and I enjoy teasing her for scooting around like a dog with worms.

I gagged.

WOULD.

I’m all choked up. That you would take my advice gets right at my little marshmallow heart. It sounds like you’re doing it right, because it’s the right way for you. Godspeed! To us all! Just trying to live the best life possible, even if that doesn’t mean for us what it means for others.

I mean to toss-up is there isn’t a lot going on (which I am personally okay with) and it’s hard to find smart weirdos like me. But being in Connecticut, between NYC and Boston, isn’t so bad. It’s all bullshit for everyone to some degree. BUT I firmly believe that if you pursue your happiness with a clear head and…

I just went on a very nice Bumble date last night. But I live in the ‘burbs so it seems to be full of normal human beings who aren’t complete garbage. So far...

Dolan.

I wheeze-laughed (like an old man) at this!

It’s your standard McMansion chic x1000.

Literally the only time I wash my legs.

I have really sensitive skin on my face, so I have to be very careful about what I use or I’ll get a rash or breakout. My body is cool with whatever though. I think that was the point, though yes cash-grabbing is involved of course.