I think the official version is that neither he nor anybody else was paying attention to his toddler and the kid crawled out the window. But this is a conspiracy theory thread so read into it whatever you want.

10 out of 10 for excitement and drama, but 4 out of 10 (maybe) for quality of play. Both teams seemed to think that defense means “stand around and watch until you get the ball back.”

Indeed. We’re all fortunate that he happened to be born at a time when the internet made it possible to see every moment of his brilliance.

No disrespect; I was just saying that NYC employers will be EVERY level of shitty if it makes them one more dollar.

I’m diabetic (the pancreas-is-fucked-up kind, not the I-weigh-500-pounds-and-never-exercise kind). I’m not sure whether to weep or to go full on Jezebel and say EXAMINE YOUR PRIVILEGE!!!1!!1!

I think that most employers would not be that level of shitty if the weather is so bad that people are actually endangering their lives.

Fifty percent sounds like a good start.

I’m stealing this joke.

Which Bill?

all of whom I sincerely hope never go into journalism or detective work

Out of curiosity, how many people have contacted you to apologize for insulting you during yesterday’s thread?

I don’t think there’s any analogue in American sports to being the RM manager - it might be the toughest job in all of world coaching. Lose two games in a row and the newspapers call for your resignation; lose three in a row and you’re fired. Even the Russian mob gave Mourinho a half season before firing him, and…

1) You spelled Versed correctly.

And I was trying to say in response that “there is no gun violence in Australia” is a pretty absurd statement considering that two weeks from now we’ll be flooded with articles on the one year anniversary of the Sydney hostage crisis. If three dead people instead of four raises your civic pride then hey, don’t let me…

Well then - problem solved!

My country (Australia) hasn’t had a mass shooting in almost 20 years.

I’d like to suggest Gawker Media change its slogan to “All The News The Daily Mail Prints, We Print Eight Hours Later.”

Surprised to learn hurlers wear helmets - no vital organs to protect up there.

Maybe I was just in a silly mood but I thought Weekend Update was hilarious (except Vanessa Bayer).

But when he recovers, it’ll be exactly like getting a free transfer.