So the whole point of Carrie Fisher is that she gives zero fucks. If something she says makes you uncomfortable, you need to move along.

Apple cider for real?

David has talent. Yolanda has Lyme’s.

Just wow. You lived through my worst fear. Glad you survived.

No apologies.

Mom and pop convenience store run by a Korean couple in my neighborhood. Owners both drive Hondas, and now I finally get it. They’re rebels.

2014 Hyundai Tucson Walking Dead edition. Came with pointless Zombie survival kit for the pointless people who believe in them.

Dr. Ruth is alive. That’s not unexceptional.

Why does Don need another n. That’s what I want to know.

Shut up with that. Backyard chickens are awesome.

Wait, why don’t you take it as a compliment? What are you saying?

I never intended to type Portlandia. My fingers went rogue.

I cannot understand why he didn’t go public with this sooner, lawsuit or not. This is egregious even for the shithole that is Vancouver.

Portlandia affectionately refers to it as Vantucky.

Recently traded a Veloster NA for a Sonata hybrid. I don’t know what I liked about that Velo other than it was a manual. It’s been sitting on the dealer lot for months because, ahem, it’s ugly.

All new for 2016 (not seeing it). Defiantly ugly enough to compromise the brand.

Tire pressure. 1982.

No we do not. The only problem I have with gas station attendants is that they’re completely baked so they need a little coaching. Good attitudes, though.

I had a 1981 Diesel Rabbit. It was terrible on a scale I cannot report. I had cans of ether rolling all over the floor on any given day in winter so I could try to breathe back into the carburetor after work, I had to leave it running all night when I faced serious winter just to insure it would run the next day, but…

I have no brand loyalty but I’ve bought two Hyundais in a row. This is mildly embarrassing, but I’ve gotten older and less influenced by almost everything. It’s like the one good thing there is.