Between losing his baby mama, operating a segregated factory, scaling a pneumatic subway down to 2-mile car tunnel and then trapping people in it, torturing monkeys to death with brain chips, and losing satellites because he forgot the sun existed, things are depressing for Elon nowadays. At least he can take heart in…

I can see the tweets now. “Bought moviepass, but it had a hacked smart contract, MY APES ARE GONE.”

The winning move is obviously the Trip feat. Trip is the best feat, and I will not hear otherwise.

So like, do you want the all-white dorks to dress like Middle Easterners for their session? That’d be worse, right? Do you want them to play only Western-inspired fantasy worlds, thereby ignoring the wealth of cultural influences in D&D? That’d be worse, right? Do you want them to bring in Asian and African ringers…

I’ve been a follower of Jimmysteph since they were at Escapist, and the current state of the show is the hardest-hitting it’s ever been. They also look a lot happier nowadays, and a lot healthier. Clearly a creator who’s making the right decisions for themselves and still turning out great content too. I miss…

Literally everyone who owns a modern station wagon:

That makes a lot of sense. I’ve watched videos of this company’s workflow, and they have a larger facility on the coast where they send their hulls and crew spaces for final assembly, so I was a little surprised at this whole “shove entire boat down river” approach.

I’m Professor Genki, and you’re watching Super Ethical Reality Climax! Today I’m gonna jump this flamethrower car over a busy intersection. JACKASS!

Meanwhile in the FBI:

I read this whole article waiting for the Subaru WRX and it never happened. OP’s budget will get you a WRX STI from within the past 3 years, with low mileage and a clean title. Does it have 3 doors? No. Is it American? No. Can it do snow? Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssss.

It’s a Chrysler, so the essential parts will all be fine, but anything not directly related to making it go will just fall off in a high wind.

Dschinghis Khan could actually play, though. I think.

Ah, that makes sense.

I travel everywhere in a guided missile cruiser with a destroyer picket. My boat guy tried to upsell me on those littoral combat ships, but if you can’t wage open-water war on your trip to Monaco, what’s even the point?

It’s weird that Hitmonchan is exclusively male. Its name is Hitmonchan! It wears a skirt! Is this one of those pokemon that’s a reference to some obscure Japanese media thing my weak gaijin experience just doesn’t register?

You might be thinking of Project Pluto, a proposed (but never fully built or flown) cold-war drone/cruise missile that would be powered by a single massive atomic ramjet. The idea is that it would fly at supersonic speeds over the USSR for days, leaving a trail of nuclear waste and raining down atomic bomblets, while…

I mean...

Did you play Freedom Planet?

Is a female Mr. Mime called a Ms. Mime?

If we can squander the wonders of technology murdering children in the third world, surely we can spare a few satellite-guided machine-learning kinetic kill vehicles for... Improving our own continent.