Well I’m still here baby. I’m 200 lbs and I tend to pick guys on the skinny side. They can tussle with me if they want to.

I recommend lesbianism.

you know how boys start whacking it around 10-11? girls gotta start whacking it earlier too (cause isn’t like the average age when women start masturbating like early 20s?).

If your casual sex partner isn’t doing what you ask or making it seem like a chore you can just leave or kick them out. That’s what I do.

Right? This just proves to me that filmmakers have never actually had the kind of bullshit job where you can absolutely be fired for not following all the rules, like not twisting people’s arms to sign up for the company credit card - those of us who have would make this a terrible film, since no creepy shit would…

I made it as far as the “zany” suicide device and I bailed. I also stood up during Garden State and said to my friends (we rented it and were watching it at home) “Do we have to watch this?” and I was aggressively silenced. I guess I gauged the room poorly - I just assumed everyone was hating it as much as I was...

My most embarrassing admission ever. I walked out of Fight Club before the big reveal.

900% certain at least one employee noticed, laughed, and kept walking.

I saw this on the news the other day. The judge took the contempt part to heart. She was dripping icy scorn. The quality of mercy was completely absent. And the woman’s pleas as she was escorted out were heart wrenching. I know it’s important to press charges. But there is no way that this woman wasn’t re-victimized.

An ex-boyfriend used to call me Cruella. I always assumed it was because of my impeccable fashion sense and smoking habit.

I was really hoping someone would be so self-involved as to turn a larger issue into an anecdote about a unique personal experience that does nothing to change any of the points made in the post. Thanks!

Don’t worry. I’ll disguise myself as critical respect and he’ll never find me.

If we outlaw dancing, only outlaws will be able to jump to the rhythm jump jump to the rhythm jump. Breaks my heart, it does.

Gorram Gorham High

In fairness, Maine has always been known as “America’s Chechnya”.

tried to introduce formal dances, like the waltz or the hustle

Kids - take the bonfire. You can show up to that thing high as fuck and nobody will notice because you’re standing next to a big-ass fire in the dark. And then wander off to fool around in the woods!

Let’s hope the Kardashians go on to create something as meaningful as The Special Olympics, the Promotion of a Civil Rights Act, or mandatory health care....

I feel the same way about Donald Trump, which is why even though he will end the world in a nuclear war if he becomes president, i will vote for him, just because of how many people will lose their fucking minds if he won

This isn’t a review. Madeleine isn’t writing about the movie itself - she’s writing about why she won’t see it. A very different proposition! And quite successful as such, I thought.