I believe that would be a mayonnaise outline. 

I'd savor a debate between her and Pence. She'd absolutely murder him and leave a chalk outline around his prone body. I'm not sure Mother Pence would like to have him stand so close to a woman in public, either.

If Peter Parker and Alfred get to count as “dads”, then so does

Also Cecilia is at Wired and Joshua Rivera is writing freelance at a bunch of places.

Jason is going to Bloomberg. All three Splitscreen hosts now host Triple Click at Maximum Fun. Gita Jackson is at Motherboard.

I hope you like beef wellington and risotto.

The name is spelled Vanja, but it’s pronounced X Æ A-12. 

Her mother doesn’t hate her. Her crazy-ass father and crazy-ass half-sister do.

Her own family, like Aaron Rodgers’ family, is desperate to get attention and uses her name to do so. 

Edgelord username? Daria profile icon? Disingenuous invitation to debate through rherotical questions?  Check, check, check!

Is this a parody?

The main joke is that the Snyder t-shirt guy is huffy about the idea of watching Harley Quinn because it’s “a tsunami of virtue signaling,” but reluctantly agrees to watch this week’s episode because it focuses on Batman.

Funny. Watching that scene, I couldn’t help but think of a very specific troll on i09 who impersonates another commenter that seems to have watched every single episode of Harley Quinn - despite insisting that it is a trash show that they would never watch.

Whoosh...

He’s not a ratdog.

The biggest problem for me is that George and Lorraine get married, have a son, and he grows up to be ... absolutely identical to Calvin, the boy who helped get them together 30 years ago in high school (and then inexplicably disappeared), and whom Lorraine seriously tried to bone. Why aren’t they absolutely freaked…

Oh, you poor soul. You thought this was a system war post. It’s not 2012 anymore.

Hold up, hold up ... That cast picture chosen for this article - so many questions! It has Dwayne Wayne in it! Was there a Fresh Prince / A Different World crossover I missed? And what’s Al B. Sure (aka the glorious Monobrow) doing with the cast?

Transformers (1986)