Even Dwight Howard thinks that name is fucking corny

Jon: When I was a junior in high school I was a convenience store clerk at a truck stop. I had to clean pubes and blood off in the showers.

You mean nature’s toothpicks?

He forgot one of the key purchases: the 55 gallon drum of lube so you can get good and greased up. Can’t arrest what you can’t grab.

That Forrest Gump gif but the ice cream cone is the Rams and Lt. Dan is Los Angeles.

Were you out all fucking night?

The dog had no choice but to eat baby jesus, he was sacrilicious 

I agree, this imbalance needs to stop. We need cars designed and built in America, like the Ford Focus, Buick Cascada or the Chevrolet SS.

And this shows exactly that Arena isn’t that great of a coach and Klinsmann wasn’t that bad. Funny story: it turns out that having fucking talent on your team is way more important than who is coaching. It’s almost like there are fundamental flaws in the US soccer player development system that need to be fixed but a…

At first I thought the girl up top with the mop deserved an assist, but watching it again I don’t think anybody at the top of the stairs even touched that rat. He runs/falls down the steps on his own, and then he meets the slapshot of 2017 as a reward for his troubles.

Paterno probably could have avoided the injury had he not been too busy looking the other way.

Given their draft history, isn’t letting them pick punishment enough?

It sucks to be on the receiving end of a Kobe beef.

Azteca

Then explain all the murder in the documentary I saw about John Wick.

Illuminati confirmed

You can shoot pigs out of it.