I have never seen the movie Titanic.

Like a boss.

But my best friend wins. He's never seen any of the star wars movies, at all. He prides himself on it.

I have been creeping shorter and shorter too. I recently went all in and went SUPER short. It's the best haircut of my life.

Yep. Kesha IS Jem.

That was my first thought too! I don't know about her acting chops, but she's pretty much got the persona down. Come to think of it, she may have modeled her professional career after Jem. It sure looks that way...

Kesha.

Did someone call me?

I'm curious, but I don't even want to click the video because I'm concerned it will translate to more money/fame for Tracy Anderson. She needs to disappear from the fitness industry immediately, or at least start getting the level of ridicule she deserves.

Who is voting Franzia over Dogfish Head? Reveal yourselves and face your punishment.

We gave cancer patients serious addictions and made nursing homes turf in the drug war. You had one fucking job Oxy. Take out Rush Limbaugh. You failed.

Anyone who picked Franzia over Dogfish Head 90 Minute IPA, GET OUT. 90 Minute is the Nectar of the Gods.

E vs meth! The great thing about e is that you usually get both.

i can just imagine my former adderall-addicted college self railing a couple lines and voting for it until closing time tomorrow

Same here. I could never join a gym because I run on the treadmill in my undies and a sports bra. I turn into a sweat puddle far too easily.

Too late, it's already been done:

Good, because I just cut up a bunch of papaya lines on my coffee table.

What the hell does "messy tidiness" mean?

I need this red wine v. white wine thing to be broken down even more. I love me a good glass of California chardonnay, but pinot grigio and riesling can kiss my ass. Similarly, yes to malbec and pinot noir, but death to chianti!

Why you hatin' on FRECKLES?

Selfie stick: formerly known as, a stick.

There's nothing too exciting to tell I'm afraid. She was a pretty normal kid. She was one of the more popular kids in school and I was a dorky weirdo and she was still nice to me.