I hope he’s OK. Not the least because if he is, he’s now the mayor of Buffalo pursuant to their municipal code. 

Apparently some people can get CTE from coaching football.

Derek Carr: "I would be more upset if I weren't so heavily sedated."

If we HAVE to stand for a specific song, and HAVE to put our hands on our hearts or risk getting jacked are we really free?

Huge meat eater here, Impossible burger comes very very close in my opinion to real beef patties so much so, It’s all I order at the local burger joint now.

Yeah, the plant based burgers are the abomination. Not the ones that comes from those “all-natural” factory-farmed e-coli-infested hormone-filled charnel houses. Cognitive dissonance is a helluva a drug.

More likely there were a bunch of skeptics who ordered it and while eating the real meat burgers, thinking they were the Impossible burger, they were saying, “Yuk! This is terrible! It tastes nothing like the real thing!”

Search and Rescue helicopter pilot guy here. In case any of you are wondering if this will happen to you after falling off a cliff face or something and needing an airlift, it won’t if they do their jobs right. In the organization I fly with you have to use a line attached to the litter that’s held by a member of the…

Wiping out swarms of native Californians is pretty standard for Padres.

by telling the guy arguing “we cannot improve healthcare for all americans, in a way every other first world country already has, because that might negatively impact my vast wealth” to fuck off, op

Jesus CHRIST dude how are people’s sarcasm detectors this broken?!

In a place where there is a tip jar, I would imagine that all of the tips are pooled and divided equally. So the person who served you your beverage or whatever is going to get an equal cut of anything that’s in the jar. The fact that you tipped is nice and I’m sure they appreciate it but they’re not going to really…

Wow, walking in and emptying BOTH barrels. Bet *you’re* fun to hang out with. Have a lot of normal friends with flaws and foibles and quirky traits? Or just perfectly adjusted drones?

This is why I always put my tip in the jar when the server is NOT looking. I don’t want them to see. And I always tip $20. Even if it’s just for a cup of coffee. Always. Don’t believe me? Well you’ll just have to take my word for it because no one sees me do it. But really, I am leaving a big fat tip in that jar when…

I’m sure there’s something in the Art of War about attacking your allies instead of your enemies.  Probably in the chapter about doing fucking dumb shit.

They’d rather lose to Trump than have Bernie win. These people are fucking ghouls, who care more about their money than the welfare of their country.

Talk about dedication to his players, he went out and got CTE to show his solidarity

Dear Salty,

I know we’re supposed to be laughing at Pryor, but anyone who fake swings on someone to try to get them to flinch is a huge douche.