My god, you are such a hateful crazy-person. Honestly, what the fuck is wrong with you?

So they’re a “sex offender” because they’re pointing out that people are responsible for their own damn actions. You are psychotic. Fuck off.

I agree with you about the respect and responsibility aspects, but Ms. Vagenius’s logic clearly and concisely leads to the conclusion that all hetero sex is rape and consent between men and women is impossible. Nah.

Just don’t ask women to rethink their safety plan in the middle of sex. It’s not fair and it’s not respectful.

Next, women are socialized to say yes to men. We just are. So a request between men and women isn’t one between status equals

At what point does it all become absurd, though? Is any request from a relatively stronger person to a relatively weaker person (even if that is perception-biased) coercive? I don’t know. At some point, this becomes pretty fucking stupid.

I think, sadly, that’s exactly what he/she meant. The comment reeks from lack of nuance in situations. It’s clear they believe that no matter the moment, women are the lesser powered sex, and any request made of them is some sort of power play or coercion taking place.

I don’t understand. Have you never trusted anyone in your life? I feel sorry for you.

Holy false equivalency.

You’re the reason Trump was elected.

So basically women should not interact with men at all ever again, because every single man has the potential to react violently. Period.

I agree that social and biological power dynamics can come into play, and often do, but that’s clearly not the case in the situation described in the post, and the above commenter certainly sounded like she was heading confidently down the road to “all hetero sex is rape, consent is impossible.”

I’ll assume from your lack of response that you can’t actually point out where I equivocated (maybe you should look that one up along with “coercion?”) or was date-rapey, huh?

I really struggle with this because I believe that the power difference between dudes and women can make a request a “power play” but carried to its conclusion means that consent is impossible. I don’t think that’s what the commenter I was replying to meant so I was hoping she/he’d respond and share some thoughts.

So when does “asking once” become coercion? When the person making the decision decides later they decided the wrong way?

And you should refrain from sex since you seem to believe consent is impossible. She said yes. Yes means yes. No means no.

I respect consent. If a woman says yes, she means yes. If she says no, she means no.

You sound like an idoit.

Jeez Louise he’s right and you’re calling him a creep? He doesn’t sound date rape-y at all. He sounds like he understand people. But I think you’ve long stopped thinking of men as people. It’s women like you who give actual feminists a bad rap. You hate men, and you don’t believe that women can have any sort of…

It’s not coercion, there was no leverage used, they were not in a professional power dynamic, there was no force, physical or otherwise. He whined, she relented. If you want to call simple whining sexual coercion then 85% of the sex that has ever happened in this world was coercive.

I guess personal responsibility is dead. A “No” is all it would’ve taken. You’re an adult.