El Pibe.

Yea but this cover ain't for you, homie.

Two balls in the glove gets one hand in the bush.

Just like a man. Promise her something / deliver something else.

I was at the game and am disgusted with the nats security. The dude was dumb but security sucked. He just stood there and the jive ass security sucker punched him and then tackled him before dragging him off field. And then the asshole fans cheered.

While the nickname was unfortunately well-earned, the First Lady was still angry about her husband's transgressions.

Yeah, I guess. I just remember the Cubs doing this stuff since I was a kid and I'm...not a kid anymore. Not at all.

This is all about sucking, so I'll begin with me, in a parking lot...

lol i stopped reading after idiot.

I'm no scientist but why is he ducking if it's an 8 ft doorway and he's 7'5?

Anyone else lose a bet that Hugh Laurie would be the first one with this tag on Deadspin?

Um, holy shit, they need at least 4 more garages.

When I was in Little League all the umpires were kids who played on the high school baseball team.

Damn, look at you, Mr. Popular. Not all of us were as lucky.

Sam's sexuality became an issue when NFL teams started making it an issue. They were sniffing around for it so he figured he might as well control the narrative then let some "anonymous" NFL scout/gm/official tell Peter King.

But not if he plays Mike.

The thing was that scouts were asking him about it and they knew. They wanted to test the kid's character to see if he'd tell but they also didn't want a closet case melting down or blackmail. So, he just did it so he wouldn't have to answer or dodge anymore.

Great, there goes the sanctity of my marriage. I blame Obamacare.

Sooner than you think: