“Website Writer Employs Jack Sock To Click Bate”

This is clearly fake news. There is no way Jack Sock is a real name.

Now when I hear Garvin, I only think of Fred Garvin, Male Prostitute.

Searching for this creepy bastard’s appearances on that apelike creepy bastard’s snake oil show helped me realize Karl Pilkington has the rugged handsomeness and charisma of Antonio Banderas in comparison.  

“Rich White Man Buys Rights NWA”

Warms my heart to see Dennis Coralluzzo mentioned here on Deadspin.

Maybe he just wishes it was 1979.

It was later discovered that he had only bought the organization so that he could hold a “Despite All My Rage I Am Still Just a Rat In a Cage Match”.

I’m guessing your lip still hurts because you get socked in the face every time you open your mouth.

As someone who has made that journey I can attest that it hurts like hell, but I still laugh too...

It’s one of those things where you feel bad about laughing, but... that doesn’t stop you from doing it.

Over the handlebars is never not going to be funny to me.

Reminds me of that old Hedberg joke: This is what my friend said to me; he said “You know what I like? Mashed potatoes.” It’s like, “Dude. you gotta give me time to guess.”

It makes you stronger too! My flabby ass can barley curl a 20lb bar with both hands. After a few drinks? I can curl a 100lb man with no problem. Other than giving him motion sickness...

You don’t choose the thug life, the thug life chooses you...

Mick Foley once got a flight attendant to announce prior to takeoff “joining us on the flight today, we have several WWE Superstars. And Al Snow.”

Man, this is like finding out that Frisco Jones was busted for snorting cocaine in a General Hospital bathroom. I mean Jack Wagner.

If that’s the sort of thing they wanted, why didn’t they just use the set where Stanley Kubrick faked the moon landing?

“Just wanted to apologize about the Death Star. See? I made you calamari.”