On my wish list. Sounds great.

“the Warrant is coming out of my balls.”

So here’s my personal little quasi-brush with having to witness an execution:

Hey, so, uh, listen. This is gonna sting and you’re not gonna like reading it and you’re gonna hop down to the reply button to call me all sorts of names by the third sentence, but like a lot of truths, you have to hear about it.

“Hang on, let me pour this 64 ounce Coke into my lap. There. Ahhh, bliss.”

Who gives the remotest of fucks if they are a “gold star family.”

The anger should be about the movement of an American citizen, any American citizen, being restricted because the president doesn’t like him.

I remember when SXSW was a mistake you made about a Hitchcock movie title.

I think tape was good enough for fred trump (cheap bastard) and donald uses tape because fred used it, and as with everything, replacing tape with a tie clip at this point in time would be an admission that tape is wrong which means fred was wrong which means donald is wrong, wrong is weak, and you can pry that tape…

I remember going to SXSW when it was a direction.

There are a few options for keeping the tie flat along the buttons of the shirt — the tie bar, the tie tack/pin, or the tie chain (egad, chains are gauche!) Usually the skinny end can be slid through the label in the back. I’ve gained weight over time, so some of my older, favorite ties (which fit just fine when I was…

HOW AMAZING WOULD IT BE IF THEY ROASTED HILLARY AND GENERALLY ACTED AS THOUGH SHE WERE THE SITTING PRESIDENT, a la HILLARYBEATTRUMP.ORG

Hell, go all out and have Alex Baldwin as Trump and Melissa McCarthy as Sean Spicer.

How fucking stupid do people have to be to fail to realize that their highly skilled, underpaid, migratory workforce is going to be the first on the chopping block? Because Ag labor is skilled labor, not something that a bunch of desperate, out of work suburbanites can learn in an afternoon. And not something a bunch…

Irregardless, Boston sucks.

No snark. Proud owner of a rescue lab mix. This is Chief. I know it sounds trite, but he knows he was rescued and he is the best goddamn dog I have ever known. Pure heart. Please, if you are considering getting an animal, go to a shelter near you.

I think, like any self-respecting Imperialist, I might go for the entire Erechtheion, or maybe a Bernini. Probably because when it comes to sculptures, I can actually pick favorites. There are too many great paintings to force myself to choose just one.

Number 1A: VOGUE BALL

I had to create an account today, even if this shit stays gray because this was the best day of my pathetic life as it was a mixture of feminism and sports and hectic running between the 2...nothing got done and I love it! Ley looks properly freaked out.

Lance Armstrong - Did Not Qualify

To the Romans and Ancient Israelites: