Why are you such a dick?

It’s just meant to harass baristas.

Absolutely. Everything about this election is frightening and also tragicomic. The Jez writers are balancing the can-you-even-believe-this-shit, LOL with the CAN-YOU-EVER-BELIEVE-THIS-SHIT-WTF!

What does “knife-fight”-like even mean?

Almost too woke. Deserves a nap.

Christ, leave it to Juzwiak to shit on nice words. Sorry he might not want to fuck you, Rich. I know that always comes off like a personal insult.

Jesus Christ, it’s like the know the house is about to collapse.

This almost feels inevitable.

OMG vomit bags? Wow, you seem to be taking their reactions way too seriously. You need to calm down, ya li’l snowflake.

Easily.

How do you get off on calling someone a cunt, you pathetic little shitbag?

Thanks, Some Old Guy. Helpful commentary.

Yes.

The Obamas are so fucking decent and delightful. For the past few months, my co-worker keeps saying to me, “Can’t Obama just stay? Can’t he just stay?”

God bless you.

Wow, what a fucking correction.

You’re still talking. That’s a shitty look on you.

You think that I care. I pity you for that massive fuck up.