Prevent it from using cloud storage. Given that it “must” have microsoft office installed; g’wan try to do that, just try... no luck, right? whirling beachball o’ doom, yes? Yet msword or die! (“hey we’re talk’n 21st century word processing here! convenience and speed are such 20th century concepts”)

See the image of the nice man on the top of this post? He’s sitting between some plastic covered hot-boxes (or small green houses). If you have an aphid problem in such an area then dumping your ladybugs in there will constrain them to some degree to stay in there - and your aphids will be gone before the ladybugs…

The ethicist in me sez: the government should never be in the business of killing or torturing people. But the biochemist in me asks: why does it somehow run afoul of a legal system, which permits this sort of injection horrorshow, to simply fill a chamber containing one prisoner to be snuffed with an inert gas?…

How many car models currently have an emergency brake which can be applied in the event of no battery power? and/or, was a lever connected to a length of aircraft cable really so distasteful to engineering and marketing? (“and hey you kids, get off’n ma lawn!”)

gelatin is made from hooves, yknow

So the leading conjecture is: A global nuclear winter might distract folks from trump’s russian treason.

How about the eluded to method of war gas delivery in this case: via helicopter (essentially hover and roll out the barrel bomb); if this is the case then bombing an airstrip (for “fixed wing” aircraft) would be utterly pointless. So in summary: (1) warn the Russians (hence the Syrians) to evacuate all assets, then…

No one suspected it was Spicy the whole time doing the leaks (bwahaha) ..force him to get a spray tan and a different suit and see what you get! (“No one blocks the spice! the spice must ....!”)

“215 USE BY JUN 30" ... to which 215 says: what year??

whip fun fact: this creation would qualify as a “knout”. (“meh that’s only worth 9 in scrabble”)

heat some water to 100-112 degress

keeping in mind that if your kindle is arbitrarily judged “older” rebooting might end up risking connectivity ...amazon ain’t say’n.

Bring back the kindle-dx! enough of these tiny micro screens for little folks with tiny micro hands. some of us macho types gots the big hands, and we like our pdf tech pages to be there all at once booyah [tim allen grunting noises]

Bring back the kindle-dx! enough of these tiny micro screens for little folks with tiny micro hands. some of us…

or resolve whatever your digital clock currently displays (neglecting the colon) to its prime factors (11:53 can be a challenge)

Were a video leaked: “that’s not me, that’s Alec Baldwin”

Establishing an intellect of an average 7 year old is still insufficient justification for impeachment, is it? (“and what makes you think he qualifies for ‘average’?!”)

“Telsa updates autopilot to drive you to a bar instead of your polling place - Musk meeting with trump pronounced unrelated”

Properly conducted this will leave us with a government of idiots and liars, with a clear gradient toward those who can be checked off as ‘both’. (“ey, how does that represent a change?!” ...well, now it’s formally institutionalized)

letsee... no place to plug in anything... that much checks out

step one: impeach trump