The judge has colorfully reaffirmed a golden rule of social media: old people shouldn’t use Facebook.

Tennis is about two more match-fixing scandals away from being the next jai alai.

Following Florio trying to give away those codes delivered more heartbreak and despair than Manti Te’o’s college sweetheart.

Wondering when the game will introduce the umpire armband option, for all those times guys hurl buckets of verbal abuse at the tv screen.

Love the shark fin move with the left hand. Good for steering.

Cue opposing montage of David Price throwing fastballs at kittens for dramatic effect, a la Rocky 3.

Playing the Padres undoubtedly lent the game that old familiar AAA vibe that he’s been used to this year.

If John McGrath wants to write about politics during the off-season, he certainly has the right to do so, but his sanctimonious political bleating is “distracting and potentially divisive” to people who would like to read about football.

The best part of Gennett’s delivery is its complete lack of mystery. He looks like a dad pitching to the one kid on the little league team who hasn’t got a hit yet.

Harbaugh’s going to milk this for all it’s worth.

“No, they were saying ‘Booooo-Ryan!’”

You know that all of his friends are trying to get him into their fantasy leagues.

Only way you’re putting money on McGregor now is because you think the fight’s not on the level.

Oh my god. He’s going to get murdered.

To be fair, there’s good shopping in Stab City. Always a good deal on smack and hunting knives.

At the insistence of his editor, the author ruefully removed the following sentence: “Glumly peering into their half-filled bowls of Lucky Charms, each morning, the downtrodden people of Dublin fill their thermoses full of whisky and stagger down to the pub, where they dance jigs and fight each other as the jukebox…

If you think he’s mad now, wait until somebody forgets “lemon shrimp” in his list of all of the possible ways to make shrimp.

Massive lost opportunities here. These reporters should be reading their articles in silly voices and emailing the audio to Fox.

Anybody considering journalism as a career should take a good hard look at the closeup of Billy’s shoes.

Had he not protested and quit, no one would have ever known or cared about his identity.