As someone who rides a ZG1000 and a TW 200, and has owned everything from sport bikes to mopeds, my biggest complaint is the lack of small, fun motorcycles. All of my friends that want to get into riding have no choice but to buy really ugly, but reliable 80s bikes (I'm looking at you, CM200t) or cute but barely on…

EXACTLY.

There is no way that the true hipster brand isn't Studebaker. It's got old school Jim Henson/Fozzie Bear cred for fucks sake. Nothing gonna beat that.
And when you look at the fact that the Lark could get more than 23mpg? AMC doesn't have a chance.

fuck a background check, right guys?

Also, one of the largest moped presences of the last 20 years comes from the other side of Michigan, 1977mopeds from Kalamazoo. They're a huge reason why this subculture exists.

I'll give you the same advice I've been giving new moped riders for years: Get a new Tomos, wear a fullface helmet, and realize that it's about the funnest/dumbest thing in the world. Vintage bikes are rad, but first bikes should always be something new and reliable, and since you can get a brand new bike for $1200,…

I'm glad my taxi company has two separate apps that people can use (Go Fast Cab and Curb, which is the largest in the US). I'm not sure where you get your information from about the literally tens of thousands of cab companies in the US, and how much they all hate technology, but hey, I don't come to Jalopnik for any…

Even prostitutes won't sleep with dudes who get out of minivans. :(

The point of my post was that you're obviously not an expert at taxis, or what it's like being in a taxi. Citing an example of one bad cab ride is basically irrelevant. But here, I can play too:

I took a cab 6 months ago in New Orleans. Aside from the embarrassment of stepping out of an American made minivan in full…

Wow! You really seem like an expert on this! 2-3 years ago a thing happened! Holy shit, let's change everything!

An intelligent comment about Uber on Jalopnik? My mind is blown. It's usually just "one time I took a taxi and the guy was rude, waaaaaaaaah"

Have you ever been to Phoenix in August? Worst godforsaken shithole on the planet. Never mind the idiot rednecks with guns who hate public transportation, bikes, Mexicans, gays, and any sort of progress.

It's a cool trip, but not as cool as riding 65cc single speed mopeds from SF to South America:

Ha, yup, judged harshly by the amateur drivers of the world.

I take at least one person a month to the hospital in my taxi. We are definitely emergency vehicles. I've had two friends have people die in their taxi, and one friend who helped deliver a baby.

Because why bother hiring drivers that actually know where they're going? Much too complicated. Like background checks.

700 pound Connie + gear, in sand. All bikes are adventure bikes.

suzuki made a great 2 stroke workhorse also named Bearcat. Maybe there should be a moto version of this list?

as someone who's driven across the country 6 times, through 45 states, I can't believe "bring at least 60 hours of music" isn't on this list.

rather have a Cobra. 4 stroke mopeds are dogs, especially with all that gear on it.