Whatever my input is worth, I’ve never cared for these kind of articles. I’m all for non-serious presentations of strange and weird information, but this kind of complex, completely false article is just a waste of my time and brainspace. Seems like an actual exploration of presidential limo concepts would’ve made a…

So, in a nutshell, you’re going political now.

Yo skay I heard you like ships shipping ships so I got you a ship shipping ship shipping shipping ships

I’ve been to at least 4 parties in my life. 8 if I’m allowed to count my own kids’ birthday parties

Don’t act like you go to parties.

He could of swapped out her old dull necklace for a pearl necklace.

Now when you say “kicking everyone else’s ass”, you mean “artificially manipulating their currency to keep an advantageous position for their manufacturing industry because otherwise their economy would collapse and in all likelihood cause the end to their communist regime”, right?

It’s all good. For their effort, they’re rewarded with a one year renewable scholarship, sometimes leading to a highly marketable degree in (whatever the easiest major is at Oregon, because they don’t have time to do anything else).

Kids these days are so soft. Back in my day, you weren’t done in Oregon until you died of dysentery.

Zoom and flip!

“You think that’s bad—you should see my videos of the things they say at practice”

Having spent at one point in my life, no exaggeration, 40+ hours on the phone being jerked around by a local court system attempting to figure out what happened to a fine that I had paid, after they told me I had to show up in court (2 states away) because they had no record of me paying it... I salute this man.

The Lebanon DMV employees—the good sports they are—reportedly aren’t “mad” about counting the coins.

Considering how concerned Vay is after this, I can only assume he’s Canadian.

Mallards never duck a fight.

She was referring to the vandalism, not Gettleman’s hair style.

Facing a 2020 lineup that apparently also includes fucking Mario Cuomo,

He’s not looking to profit from this. He’s just looking for the Museum to restore the vehicle back to the condition that it should have been kept in. He’s suing for the damages that the museum caused or allowed to happen to his property.

Easily the worst thing about college football is that both teams can’t lose.