I grew up Evangelical. You’re absolutely right-Evangelicals have done some real good in the world. They do some things very poorly as well. I’ve grown up experiencing both (because I’m human and so are they). Even though I’ve explored non-evangelical Christian denominations since I was 18, I will never be able to…

Too much backstory for here. But enough where she made it about her. It helps to just determine that you will enjoy it and support your sister no matter what your mother does. And if you have any power over it, let her have as little contact with your sister on that day.

Ah I wish I would’ve done this with my mother on our wedding day! And exactly as you said, she wasn’t any different than how she’s always been. I guess I assumed naively since it was *my* wedding day that she would be kinder and more supportive. It actually made my husband and I’s relationship stronger as he had never…

Lose-lose exactly. I’m sorry she cut you off. I saw a trailer for a movie coming out that had a line that made me a little better (it’s a movie but I’ll take what I can get): “it’s not your kids’ job to love you, it’s your job to love them”. It's her responsibility to be a good mother to you. Hopefully that helps you…

Yeah and that’s why I mentioned that batterers intervention has a 2% success rate. So far there’s no such thing as “rapist intervention” and idk if there ever will be. Just based on my beliefs though, I don't believe in just locking anyone up and throwing away the key. So I don't know what a good answer is either. I…

Yeah and that specifically is why Id love to see victims have a voice in their prison sentence. Because hopefully someone staying in prison makes the victim feel safer and BE safer.

Eh, I think it would need to be decided between the victim and the prosecuting team. I think that is something that would aid in healing. When you’re sexually assaulted, your choices and decision-making get taken away from you. I think that letting victims aid in the sentencing would let them take some of that power…

I didn’t say it was desirable- I said it could be something to make the victim feel safer-like he wouldn’t reoffend against them or someone else. But that it wouldn’t actually make them any safer-they would just have that illusion.

Honestly, cruel and unusual punishment is up-in-the-air for me. Philosophically, I’m…

See, my expertise is not philosophy or questions like this so I don’t have a good answer to your response but just based on my experience...that is why I think it would need approval by the prosecutor or judge in the case. I think for some victims death isn’t even good enough for what they did (and I don’t blame them)…

At least in the place it’s at, I don’t think it’s purpose is to rehabilitate. Prison is the last place for a rapist to become rehabilitated. I think it is to punish. If it was to rehabilitate, I know some people would argue that they should stay incarcerated for the rest of their life then.

I’m desperately trying hard to be surprised. Maybe if I pretend to be surprised eventually I will be. Maybe one day I’ll actually be surprised..when the sentence actually fits the crime.

I don’t even feel like Mellie is that amoral (does that make me amoral too possibly? Let’s not delve into that thought). I feel like more than the semi-sketchy things she does, that she’s just a woman who has been screwed over far too many times and has realized that no one is going to fight for her so she has to…

Agreed. Like why was he so upset?! I get that she conspired with Rowan and that he’s like the worst person on Earth but who hasn’t had to do something they didn’t want to because Rowan practically gave them no other choice?! And I feel like Mellie complied because she didn’t want Fitz’s stuff to get out there either.…

Thank you! He's a rescue so I'm not exactly sure but I think around 3 years old. I hope your pup behaves on your wedding day too! Even if he doesn't, they are such fun to have because they can't really do anything wrong! (except pee on your dress...don't let him do that!)

One more just because I’m obsessed with him and you have given me an outlet for all of my obsession. #sorrynotsorry This was him during the ceremony. He did so good!

My dog was our “Ringpupper” and I'm so glad I included him. Pros: super cute and a fun add-on to our wedding (since he really IS family) Cons: a little complicated figuring out where he would go afterwards. Yes, would recommend.

Ah very similar childhoods/adult lives now! Yesss to all of that-the complicated, messy emotions where you don’t get to completely feel one way or the other. And the complicated, messy road it all takes you down. The. Worst.

Middle-grounder too! My husband gets frustrated with the situation and asks when I’m going to cut her out of my life but I just can’t yet. I hope I don’t regret anything but I can’t figure out any other positive way to stay sane and mentally healthy and still let her have unrestricted access to my life. I hate the…

Yeah it's widely-known at OU what these frat boys do in their spare time. And yet they still exist as a whole. Granted, I have no way of knowing if President Boren knows exactly what the rumors are, but the majority of the student population does. If a fraternity doesn't have something against women, they have…

It's unsurprising that he would get invited to other parties. If he can frame it so that the victims are "sluts" who just "lied" and were "embarrassed about giving it up so easily" then he's not really a rapist right? He's just a nice guy who slept with some "psycho crazy biotch who's totally still in love with him".…