I want to talk more about this general counsel who thinks it’s a good idea to begin an email with “We are anxious to settle this matter.”

That last email is the one you should have sent first, and it’s a shame you had to let Bret Fucking Stephens hand you your ass before you realized that.

Also how has no one turn this into a gif?

I was going to comment something on this, but seriously, I can’t think of anything better than “VIETNAM MOTHERFUCKERS”.

“Mike Ogren” sounds like a rejected name from a Chris Farley skit about eating paint chips.

I wish I were in his orbit enough to deserve more than the sideburn of “you’re a sheep for following free agency gossip.”

 He’s been my favorite sports columnist for as long as I can remember having a favorite sports columnist. 

Most of this, of course, is just watching how the media covers a thing rather than the thing itself, and as a long-time member of the media, let me tell you that the media is almost always deathly dull as a subject. It’s a tedious festival of solipsism in which people like their facts only in the speculative realm,…

So, a bunch of people whom I assume are long-time readers of yours welcomed you, and after a few columns, I’m enjoying your style. However this:

This was some overwrought logorrhea.

Agreed. The author might have sprained a muscle preening so hard.

Well, if they’re rigged games, why do they even need officials at all? Just tell Marv Albert and Mike Breen the finish and let them build the drama.

You must be a Rockets fan.

A stance against what? Calling fouls? This “it’s personal” crap is garbage. 

I have zero sympathy for Harden who, as rightly noted in the article, gets his numbers by abusing the fringes of the rule book and basically demanding refs to slow down games by calling him for obvious fouls.

jAmES hArdEN OnLY DrAWs fOulS hE DoEsn’T coMMiT tHEm

And absolutely not dribble while doing so.

I understand that Harden is upset, but before making comments like these after games he should just take a step back and then take a step back and think.

The Lakers ultimate offer was fresh shit kibble? I am intrigued as to how you reached that conclusion.

I wonder how much of that $50k was to license Karen McDougal’s voice saying “Great shot, Mr. President!” after every shot.

Good luck. Far be it for me to offer any suggestions, so instead I’ll offer up my experience: working on my short game is the most important factor in playing relatively well. If I hit 12 greens in regulation, it’s been a good round. If I mange to get up and down 5 out of 6 times, the round can’t be too bad unless my…