Time to call in Newt to round out this cast of cheating hypocrites.

“I did not have an affair, but if I did it would have been OK because we were separated at the time.”

When someone accuses me of something I definitely didn’t do, I always give the standard response of an innocent person: “There’s no proof.” 

I am going to have a serious discussion with my editor.

“denied the affair, though he claimed he was separated at the time anyway”

Dude needs to be a better attorney 

“I never spent the night with her. There’s no proof. There can’t be because we never did anything.”

who didn’t sign a prenup

I recommended, but I would amend that statement to say “surprise” instead of “disappoint”. :)

The shameless hypocrisy of these nazis never disappoints.

Warms my heart.

Tell them you’re from Canada?

Oooooh, never mind trying to pretend to be Canadian. Be prepared to apologize often. Try apologizing with wine.

Do what every other sensible American does when traveling abroad, say you’re Canadian.

Buy your maple leaf t shirt now my friend

I’m hanging out with extended family. This will be discussed, I guarantee.

That fact that he insists on referring to other world leaders by their first names in his idiot tweets enrages me. Such a narcissistic, boorish dipshit.

Remind me how much defense spending was increased for the next time (tomorrow) this orange toddler brings up how much the dairy exports to Canada are damaging the U.S economy?....

Oh yeah. All three GOP election victories—both of Dubya’s, and Trump’s—have been perfectly legitimate. All the best people say so.

Okay, then how do you explain two terms of George W. Bush?