I have no idea what this woman’s religious affiliation is. However, here’s part of a song we sing at the Unitarian Universalist church...

Those are the only good ones. The rest of the pre-mixed drinks are all garbage. But the Skinnygirl Margaritas mixed with some ice and a little diet Sprite are pretty damn good.

Have you been to Homasassa Springs/Crystal River? BEST DAY EVER . . . snorkeling with mantatee tours!!!

I’ve been in the water with manatees and not only are they chill, they are SILENT. Unless you see them pop up a cute snout to snuffle a tiny bit, you won’t hear them and they won’t mess with you at all if you don’t want then around or aren’t wearing a bikini made out of lettuce or something.

DO IT! They are awesome and it is cheap and hell to live here. Seriously. Forget the haters, live on a condo by the beach or inlet!

When I taught at schools with high numbers of students in poverty, those students had free breakfasts and lunches in the cafeteria. Is that what Gwyneth’s kids are going to do? If so, then I could see this food just barely making it. Though I highly doubt they attend a public school.

My cat once got mad that I ws out of the house for 2 nights (he was well taken care of, the asshole) so he waited for me to begin unpacking whereupon he TOOK A DUMP ON MY BED. It was kind of gangsta, like “Bitch, what you gonna do?”

Silver lining: if they are still not close, at least this couple is not in any wedding pics.
I had a former friend who I thought was a friend at the time of my wedding give a super-weak sauce excuse for skipping my wedding. I was hurt then, but I am THRILLED now that I don't have to look at those dumbasses in my…

The new flavors like caramel and candy apple are DELISH. Caramel corn gets way more hate than it deserves.

"I can't get a sitter"

My little chicas love these books, and I think they are fun too. It's awesome that they teach vocabulary words (Nancy calls them "fancy" words . . . whatever . . . having a good vocabulary is critical!) and it's really cool that the rest of the family is decidedly NOT fancy. Fanciness is just Nancy's jam, and they all…

She probably meant lactose, but damn, lady LISTEN to your diagnosis!

I found a list of girls. Yup. He was that asshole. We lived together for 3 terrible months, and the break up was super messy. He left our shared apartment, and I thought FUCK THIS and went through his stuff. (I was actually looking for drugs or hidden alcohol, as I had known him for a long time and those things would…

I'm so glad I'm not the only stair-boob-holder. I live with people, so I try to keep in on the low.

<UU fist bump> get it, girl.

yet it bumps up the probability of having super farts! Sugarless sweetners are where 90% of workplace farts originate.

I saw PJ Harvey at CMJ in 2000 and it was a religious experience. I was forever changed. That is all.

This is probably my favorite track on my favorite Missy album! Also, all the female guest spots on that record are INSANE: Lil Kim and Da Brat just fucking slay it on thatmalbum.

I'm pretty sure ridicule is, in fact, a good treatment for affluenza. Knowing everyone hates your a$$hole-ish ways is the first step on the road to recovery.

That was the line that brought tears to my eyes. I want to preach that line far and wide to all the women of the world!