I like you Anna, does that help any? Here’s a pic of me irl:

It’s like every day the world wants to give me a new thing to fear that I hadn’t even considered.

If the little brat had put her toys away, the bear wouldn’t be eating her Bubble Guppy car...

Christ. Get that cat away from sociopathic teenagers before something awful happens...

This is rape.

1. Fuck poachers.

Oh, I am jealous! Those cats are cute and they loved being scratched. I want to play with the cute kitties too!

Does he have a foot thing, too? It is almost disabling for me. I need therapy.

Exactly, his camera floated to the surface and that’s how we have this pic.

Forget the ridiculous third reason for a moment. Why do there seem to be so many otherwise intelligent people who don’t seem to understand that the vast majority of the time it’s not appropriate to act on your sexual impulses? Literally everyday of the week I work with and walk by women that I am attracted to,…

I’m feeling super hopeful. A very, very powerful man can be knocked down a peg for saying something awful that a little while ago would have passed unnoticed. Progress.

With the prize money you think he would have done something about those teeth.

If it’s any consolation, he hit on my friend in college and I stole his cell-phone number from her. I pretended to be her and led him on every time he was back in Boston, until I finally got him to show up at the Hotel Commonwealth and cut communication entirely. He got angry and vulgar; if Bob Saget thinks you’re a…

In a Wednesday press conference, Arpaio noted that the settlement was a good business decision since the girl’s family had initially sued for $30 million.

Yep. Going to go get back under the covers now.

I mean, the definition of a disorder of any kind is that it interferes with your life and causes distress... so.

Study: People with Disorders have Harder Lives.

...the topic of this Golf Digest effort—“The Hottest Patrons at Augusta”—is just awful.

Get over yourself, Teakwood. My wife wouldn't even want a quickie on the island counter.