Yeah, I have friends who have not invited me to events they hold because they assume anyone who doesn’t have kids will not want to hang out with their and their friends’ kids. I like hanging out with kids just fine, sometimes even more than adults, but I shouldn’t have to prove that I like kids by having them.

I thought that said “I spend way to much money on my drugs to afford kids”and I z-snapped my right-hand right off.

I’m 35 and child-free by choice, and had an initial appointment with a general practitioner a few years ago. She asked about prior pregnancies (ok, fair question for a medical history). When I said none, she told me that it must have been due to the endometriosis.

I usually shrug and go “Nah— it’s not my thing.” That’s so blunt that they don’t even know which path to go down to continue the badgering, so the badgering stops!

I feel about kids the same way I feel about ferrets. They seem pretty high maintnenence, I don’t want them, and I don’t give much thought to them unless someone asks why I don’t have one. Surely women can be permitted to be as apathetic about children as men are.

Seriously. I am offended that every woman who has to explain why she didn’t have children is also expected to mention that children are OK by her. Like, “Oh, no, I don’t want kids. They’re fine. I don’t hate them. I’m a devoted auntie...” like we still have to be defined by our relationship with kids. How about “No,…

Gella, Why is this question stupid? I haven’t asked it of very many people, but when I have, I have gotten some very thoughtful answers. Definitely better answers than for “Where do you work?”

I’m a gay man who coupled off when I was 23 (my husband was 22) in the 80s. I, I, EYE get asked all the time why I never had children. My now-husband and I actually talked about it, in the late 80s. We knew what we wanted to do, two girls, preferably twins, we had the names picked out and everything, I’d stay home and…

Regional neighbor here and even in my progressive city I’ve gotten this question. Less so as I’ve hit the dark side of 38 but when it comes it’s never from family, people who have known my feelings since I was quite small. It’s always either much older grandmotherly busybodies (to whom I must look young enough to…

I live in the South and get: “Have you considered adopting?”

It’s weird that everyone who decides not to have children must add a footnote that they don’t hate kids.

“But who will take care of you when you are older?” 

An army of health care professionals that I will be able to afford because I didn’t spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to send junior to a liberal arts school for 6 years to get a degree they can’t use.

This is because the moment you say you don’t want kids, everyone exclaims, “But don’t you love babies! Babies are so cute! Children will make you a real human being! I never loved until I had a child! Your decision is very bad because kids are so great!”

There’s no shame in it, but people don’t understand that many women are childless not by choice, but by shitty circumstances and bad luck. It’s an incredibly rude question to begin with, but also extremely emotional and upsetting for a lot of women.

Yep. I didn’t want kids at all when I was younger. Later I thought I might want one, but was in my late-30s and ended up not being able to maintain a pregnancy past 14 weeks. Contemplated adoption but realized I didn’t want a kid bad enough to jump through those hoops. So I don’t have kids, and I’m totally cool with…

It really is a thing of beauty, this response. With just a trace of shade (“I really appreciate that other people do”), like nutmeg in a risotto.

I tell people I do hate kids. If they’re stupid enough to believe me, fuck ‘em.

“Some of my best friends have children.”

I absolutely love that there are women like Ina coming out and saying this in a frank way. There should be no shame in deciding not to have children. Just like there shouldn’t be shame in deciding to have children. Or even trying to have children and not succeeding (another thing that people have become increasingly…

I would have gone with “why have children when you can have cake?” but that’s just how I roll. (Also, cake).