You think 'Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas' is anti-sex? I recommend fucking your wife before an open fire on Christmas Eve with the kids upstairs asleep and no lights on except the Christmas tree while Bing Mellotone wafts round the house, and then come back and report your findings. Assuming you have a wife…

How does he do it?

I'm sorry but I am not making the point that 'songs antithetical to everything' cannot be 'incredible'. For example, the Sex Pistol's 'God Save the Queen'.

Ummm, yeah but what does that have to do with what I said?

This is a rather boring Q&A. Songs antithetical to sex are pretty much antithetical to anything.

Well done. You almost know nothing about both history and theology.

I would add to that - '…also the MacPoyles'.

And the award for the most oblivious poster goes to…

The same people who brought about the revolution in 1776 and spearheaded the abolitionist movement in the 1800s?

Was Jackie Gleason even in Gigli?

'We'?

It seemed like a third of this review was direct quotes and then the rest of it was bulked up with stray observations from the Gawker review.

Shameful waste of Artemis,

'Get me Trayvon's non-union Mexican equivalent!'

It's like the last two episodes were first drafts. That a secretary just typed up the notes from the table brainstorm and handed them in as a shooting script. Or else Charlie, Rob and Glenn have become incredibly lazy and want the show to end as quickly as possible without incurring any contractual liabilities so they…

Bored of this narcissistically reclusive scribbler. Isn't there another genius-backing-into-the-limelight we could winkle out? What about Tom Pynchon?

So they have a fifty inch TV but they sleep on the couch?

Oh god. I wish some kid studio executive whose only qualification for the job is eight years in hebrew school and an uncle who owns seven per cent of the studio would wake up and say: 'You know? What we need is a Diana versus Grace franchise! Like Alien versus Predator but classy, with more sapphic undertones. …But…

What?

If it's funny, why are you so furious? Is it because of your role as Freelance Warrior Against Imagined Internet Racism?