And in Texas it wouldn’t be “Ura” - it would be “Y’alla.”

He’s a billionaire. I’m sure he never eats at his own restaurant. I’m guessing he underpays a private chef to cook for him (who spits in his food).

I remember. It also came out that the cost of providing all of his employees with sustainable health insurance was about the same amount of money as the value of his primary residence.

“Your Delmonico was $54 instead of $50 because apparently my staff wants ‘shelter’ and ‘food for their children.’ MAGA.”

Flacco was really, really good during that one playoff run, and at other select times he has been phenomenal. But then he’s crushingly mediocre at every other moment in his career. In a way, that makes it worse - like, we know you can do better. Dilfer at least had the common courtesy to be mediocre all the time.

I’ve been a Ravens fan for years. I watch soccer now because it’s more interesting and there is more scoring.

Ask a lawyer: Is a wedding ceremony held on the moon legally binding?

Ghitelman with the Gilman.

You can totally get leprosy from an armadillo. I think you get salmonella from reptiles and birds, and, ironically, from contaminated ice cream 

Is this the Sandy Hook of police shootings? Is this the worst possible thing “we” can ignore as a society without lifting a fucking finger to do anything to change anything? Jesus fucking Christ - shooting a pregnant woman because she was holding scissors.

Nice, I was going to go with “vanilla-thalidomide swirl” in order to get a jump on treating your armadillo-induced leprosy outbreak, but yours is much better.

Oh darn.

Remember when Trump allegedly slapped Don Jr. across the face for not wearing a suit? I wonder of they had a conversation on Marine One about his attire and that explains the long faces.

For years I was a government attorney for a major agency in a large conservative state. Every year, in addition to our legal training and basic common sense, we had ethics training and open records training. We were told that anything we put on our personal devices was potentially subject to open records, and that we…

That whole “ignorance of the law” thing is just for the poors.

Something about “why didn’t you run this up the ladder?” Is that where we are going? Really? It’s the PRESIDENT of the UNITED STATES asking the DIRECTOR of the fucking FBI to pretty please drop an investigation. There is no ladder. Going to the Senate is “running it up the ladder.” Jesus. As if he had to go ask his…

Locutus 2020

Borg assimilation is actually starting to look pretty good at this point. There’s opportunity for travel, experiencing new cultures, and universal health care.

“We understand that associates [our army of underpaid drones] may have to miss work on occasion, and we have processes [the United States Government has welfare programs designed to assist the desperately poor] in place to assist them [that we instruct them on how to use before we fire them].”