He was, in fact, arrested on the spot. 

Swerving with full tongue. Obviously.

If you watched the video you'd know he was arrested at the end

Not necessarily - if everyone thinks the captain is a tool he might be congratulated for getting rid of him.

I continue to dutifully volunteer my time for “field research” for many alcohol manufacturers

Can’t help but hear that response in my head as the Robocop voice.

I also worked in “field research” for a variety of alcohol manufacturers.

I worked in field research for a major alcohol manufacturer, we used to joke that the number of “drinks per week” people claimed in our work were halved or doubled depending on what they thought of you.

Or a career with the police for much longer.

The requirement of many police departments to keep their body and car cameras running at all times is perhaps one of the biggest contributors to eliminating some of the corruption whereas in the past they would give other officers a break and let them off the hook. Now if they were to do something like that its all on…

I mean, fuck cops and all that, but I’m not sure the “semi” qualifier was necessary here. Dude did everything correctly.

Three or four beers? Cans or pitchers? No way that guy got that drunk off of just three or four cans or bottles. Unless he was drinking Prairie Bombs, I guess.

Kudos to that cop who followed procedure and basically busted his boss. I’m sure he’ll get skewered by other, shittier cops for it.

“I don’t care if you’re a gangbanger or the President of the United States.”

“I don’t show favoritism to anyone, regardless. I don’t care if you’re a gangbanger or the President of the United States.” Good for that cop. Probably will never have a career with the GOP with that attitude though.

Oscars face ongoing criticism from a couple of white people on twitter over “Naatu Naatu” performance

‘The only winning move is not to play’

Heh. Awkward. (This is the part where everyone stays mum because we all just assumed those lead dancers WERE South Asian ;)

My father gave the same speech at my wedding.

I don’t consider a movie truly a best picture unless it wins a Nickelodeon Kid’s Choice Award. You ain’t a winner in my book until you get slimed